Posts tagged happiness
Goldilocks Inspires Useful Clues for How to Really Let Go

Do you remember the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears? One of the main themes is Goldilocks’ search for what felt “just right.” One chair was too big, and another too small. She rejected both. However, when she found the one that fit, she knew it was the one for her and used it. The chair was right-sized and “just right” for her.

At the core of the Goldilocks philosophy is finding the sweet spot, the optimal place where things feel balanced, comfortable, and supportive. Who knew Goldilocks could help with letting go?

Are you struggling to let go of things, ideas, habits, or commitments? If so, a Goldilocks approach could help. Her decision tree went like this:

“This bed is too hard.”

“This bed is too soft.”

“This bed is just right.”

What will “just right” look and feel like for you?

 

 

 

 

Why is Letting Go Overwhelming?

There can be a lot to sort through, which can make letting go feel overwhelming. Clutter can accumulate from:

  • years of acquiring

  • gifts and inherited items from others

  • postponed decisions

  • emotional attachments

  • unclear or nonexistent organizational systems

  • being overscheduled

  • unclear boundaries

  • not following through on closure loops

Time is part of the equation, too. You need time to make decisions and to align what you own with who you are and what you need now. This can be tricky if you feel stuck in the past or are holding onto things for an aspirational future or self.

However, when you start making decisions based on who you are now and your current needs, it brings greater clarity as you let go.

 

 

 

Are You Sacrificing the Present?

Many years ago, I attended an ICD class on consumerism, minimalism, and experimentalism, presented by my friend and colleague, Lynne Johnson. She shared a quote about letting go.

How much of your present are you willing to sacrifice in order to save remembrances of your past to ponder in your future?
— Anonymous

The question aligns with the Goldilocks philosophy of the three-point decision tree, but from a time-based perspective. Consider what you are holding onto in relation to the:

  • Past - Are you willing to hold on to things from your past that keep you stuck and no longer serve you? Can you release them and move on?

  • Present - Are you willing to let those things take up physical space and mental energy, distracting you from the present? Can you let go and be more aligned with the present?

  • Future - Are you holding onto things with a glimmer of hope that you will revisit, use, or need them someday? Can you say goodbye to them in service of an unencumbered future?

 

 

What DOES Letting GO Look Like?

When you release what you no longer need, you invite more ease, better life alignment, joy, and growth. Even releasing one thing makes room for what’s most important, essential, and valued by you.

Letting go can look like this:

  • Donate the never-used pots and pans to make the ones used regularly more accessible.

  • Release rarely-used purses to make room for the ones you do use.

  • Recycle the papers that ‘time took care of’ so you can focus on what’s current.

  • Skip the to-do list to enjoy a beautiful spring weekend day.

What does letting go look like for you?

 

  

 

The Goldilocks of Letting Go

What happens when you begin to align your life so it feels “just right?” Will you release what no longer belongs, brings you joy, or is useful? Will letting go bring you closer to living your best life now? When you release what's blocking your energy, space, and thoughts, you create room for calm, growth, and happiness.

Which ideas resonate with you most? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 

 

 

How Can I Help?

Do you feel overwhelmed or disorganized? Do you want to let go of the unnecessary but feel stuck or unsure where to start? I’m here to help! You don’t have to do this alone. Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – Local feel with a global reach.

Let’s connect! I’m easy to reach.

Letting go and getting organized are possible, especially with support.

 
 
How to Nurture Joy, Reduce Anxiety, and Bring Balance to the Holidays

Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way! I can hear that tune, the sound of the bells, the smell of pine, and the sight of twinkling lights brightening the dark night. This is the season of festivities, gatherings, and joy. It’s also a time when it's all too easy to overdo, overindulge, and overcommit.

Here’s the good news. If you’re already feeling like it’s too much, I’ve come up with some antidotes. You can increase joy, reduce anxiety and stress, and restore more balance. Of course, you can use these strategies at any time, but they can be especially helpful during the holidays when stress can be high.

The underlying concept is based on what you might need more of or less of right now. Experimenting with even one of these could bring you more joy and happiness today. And what’s not to love about that?

 

 

 

 

4 Ways to Foster Joy, Reduce Anxiety, and Bring More Balance Right Now

What I love about these techniques is their simplicity and their ability to address a wide range of needs. Maybe you’re tired or anxious. Perhaps you want to have more fun. Or maybe you’re yearning for the familiar. There’s something for everyone. Pick and choose which strategy or combination of techniques will be most useful for you.


1. Invite in More Rest

I remember kindergarten, when the teacher insisted on nap time. We would unroll uncomfortable, smelly mats onto the hard floor, be quiet and still (not easy for a five-year-old Linda), and be forced to nap for what felt like an eternity. Naptime felt like a punishment. I felt like I was missing out on life. Instead, I wanted to play, talk, learn, and interact with my friends.

However, as an adult, I’ve come to respect and understand the value of giving my mind and body a short time to rest. It’s a beautiful way to stop, refresh, and return with more energy, focus, and kindness.

If you go all in, you’ll come back feeling more relaxed and joy-filled. Here’s the recipe for a short, restorative rest:

  • Find a quiet spot.

  • Wrap yourself in the coziest blanket (my favorite part).

  • Dim the lights.

  • Set an alarm for 15-20 minutes.

  • Allow yourself to settle.

  • Nap away.

This is a wonderful antidote to the “overdoing it” that often comes with the holiday season. If you’re tired or cranky, invite in some rest. Wake up more joy-filled.

 

 

2. Engage in Spontaneous Fun

There are so many truly horrific things happening in the world. They weigh heavily on our hearts and minds, making the idea of having fun feel impossible or inappropriate.

However, to handle the hard things life brings, it’s important to bring some balance by replenishing your resilience reserves. One way to do this is to invite in fun, even if it’s unplanned. Say yes to silliness. That might look like going to a comedy show, having a snowball fight, playing charades, or listening to music while doing goofy dance moves.

The other day, my husband and I had a wonderful BBQ lunch at a local restaurant. It was delicious and filling. It was also right near a local mall. After lunch, we went to the mall, not to shop, but to walk off the beef brisket and hot sausage sandwiches we had just eaten.

As we walked, we discovered Dream Riders, a store that offers electric ride-on plush animals. While they are marketed for kids, adults can ride them, too. I saw the animals lined up and a few kids riding them around, and I thought, “Hey, this looks like fun. I want to try it!”

And since Steve is always up for anything (one of the many things I love about him), he was on board immediately. We spent 10 minutes riding, laughing, smiling, and having a blast. Aside from having fun, the sight of us enjoying ourselves made other people smile and laugh as we passed by, riding our Panda and Tiger.

Embracing impromptu or intentional fun during the holiday season is a wonderful way to nurture joy.

  

Say yes to silliness.
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

 

3. Do a Quick Reset

A few weeks ago, I shared five simple practices to reduce stress. I have one more that helps with handling anxiety, which can surface during the holidays. As wonderful as it can be to visit with family, it can also be anxiety-producing to return home. Anxiety can surface from being around too many people, experiencing more noise than you’re used to, having your routines disrupted, or having unhealthy childhood habits, relationship patterns, or interactions surface.

One strategy that helps is using the 3-3-3 Rule. It’s a simple, effective reset that can be used anywhere, anytime. Here is the method:

  • Set: If possible, go to a private space, such as a bedroom or bathroom, where you won't be disturbed.

  • See: Name three things you see, like a blue glass sink, a green plant, or a white wall lamp.

  • Hear: Name three sounds you hear, like people talking in the other room, the boiler humming, or a truck rumbling outside.

  • Move: Move three parts of your body, such as opening and closing your hands, moving your head side to side, or stretching your arms above your head.

Exercising the 3-3-3 Rule will create distance from your anxious thoughts and ground you in the present moment by engaging with your environment and physical sensations.

This reset is an excellent strategy to reduce anxiety and restore balance during the holiday season and beyond.

  

 

4. Revisit a Tradition

I’m not sure if you’ve had this experience, but for me, some seasonal traditions remain, some are reimagined, and others disappear completely. These traditions can evoke a mix of feelings, from joy and happiness to grief, frustration, longing, excitement, and relief.

One annual tradition we look forward to is celebrating the winter solstice. Lighting the giant bonfire in the woods signals a transition to the new season. It also marks a change, with a gradual return to less darkness and longer, light-filled days.

For 32 years, our friends have invited family and friends to join this magical experience. At night, each person carries a lit candle up the hill into the woods, where a tepee-like structure of wooden sticks stands tall in the darkness. Before the bonfire is lit, we are encouraged to reflect on what was, release what we no longer want, and imagine how we wish the new year to be. The structure is lit and begins to burn slowly.

When ready, each person carefully approaches the fire and tosses their candle in. I watch, mesmerized and in awe, as the flames gain energy and bring warmth. Tinder sparks fly up and dance wildly against the night sky. Crackling sounds, shifting wood, and the voices of people enjoying each other’s company are the evening’s soundtrack.

Traditions can be comforting, especially those that renew and lift your soul. The winter solstice gathering is one of my favorites each year. It’s a joyful way to release the past, imagine the future, and reconnect with special friends in the present. I’m so grateful to John and Judy for keeping this tradition alive.

 

 

 

What Do You Want to Invite This Holiday Season?

Are your holidays infused with joy, anxiety, or both? How would you like them to be? Is the balance and focus off? Which strategies resonate most with you? What brings you joy and balance?

I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 

 

 

How Can I Help?

Do you feel overwhelmed, disorganized, stressed, or out of balance? Would you like to make changes? I’m here to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – Local feel with a global reach.

Let’s connect! I’m easy to reach.

Getting organized is possible, especially with support.

 
 
How to Encourage Change More from a Joy, Not Dread Perspective

When you think about change, which emotions bubble up? As someone who has observed, experienced, and helped others make changes, I’ve noticed many reactions. When anticipating change, we can experience mixed emotions, including fear, frustration, anxiety, doubt, overwhelm, sadness, ambivalence, excitement, relief, and hope.

Emotions are powerful. They can paralyze or propel us, depending on which ones are in play.

  • What if you could stack the deck in your favor?

  • What if you could shift your perspective to encourage a more joyful experience for your desired changes?

  • How would that alter your journey?

When you think about making a change, it can feel enormous, confusing, and unreachable. For example, let’s say you feel overwhelmed and frustrated by the clutter and disorganization in your life. You want things to change but don’t know what to do or how to begin. As a result, you do nothing.

A common organizing philosophy encourages breaking down large projects or goals into small, doable parts or tasks. Using this strategy is an effective path forward. You keep the larger goal in mind while focusing your effort on tiny, baby steps. This process reduces overwhelm and facilitates forward movement.

  

Encourage Change by Shifting Your Perspective

During a recent meditation and writing retreat led by my friend and colleague, Yota Schneider, she shared an insightful question. We considered it in a particular context around focusing.

However, the more I thought about it, the more I recognized how you could use the question to encourage change through a lens of positive expectations.

The question Yota shared was from neuropsychologist and author Dr. Rick Hanson. He asked,

“What will I be glad I did today?”

I appreciate the question’s simplicity and graciousness. What will I be glad I did today? The question has several fascinating effects.

  • Contemplate – It invites you to consider joy, happiness, gratification, or satisfaction as the driving force. In other words, you are taking action inspired by this positive perspective.

  • Strengthen – It offers a nonjudgmental inquiry while strengthening activation confidence. You imagine this positive change or task as if you have already accomplished it. The question boosts agency.

  • Reduce – While it doesn’t overtly state this, the question implies a narrower, singular focus. Dialing down the possibilities to something smaller can reduce or eliminate overwhelm.

  • Imagine – It merges present action with positive, immediate future results. You are doing something now that you will be happy you did later today.

  • Build – Using this question to navigate change gently promotes a repeat-and-build pattern versus a one-and-done method.

  • Act – The question is non-confrontational. It’s even kind of fun. You’re focusing on how good you’ll feel or “glad” you are when you do that thing today. 

Encourage change through a lens of positive expectations.
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Work the Present and the Future

Once you gear your mind toward a “glad I did today” focus, you will experience many positive changes that connect with your larger goals. Here are several of the positives I’ve experienced recently and the change categories they influenced. I am glad I:

Relationships – Nurture and Strengthen

  • Celebrated my husband’s birthday

  • Cooked with my daughter

  • Sent packages and notes to our kiddos in advance of Valentine’s Day

  • Had assorted conversations with friends, family, and colleagues, including a friend I hadn’t spoken with in way too many years

Professional – Lead and Learn

  • Completed the edits and returned my chapter for a new ICD book on chronic disorganization

  • Led a planning meeting for my organizing colleagues for NAPO Westchester

  • Had virtual organizing sessions with my clients

  • Wrote my blog

Finances – Manage and Build

  • Gave our accountant a preliminary tax summary

  • Paid bills

  • Reconciled accounts

Household – Maintain and Edit

  • Cleared out the 2024 files and set up the 2025 files

  • Did laundry

  • Added a few clothing items to the donation bag

Well-Being – Calm and Care

  • Scheduled vaccines

  • Didn’t eat that extra piece of cake

  • Took a walk along the river even though it was cold

  • Slept later than usual

  • Went to yoga class

  • Meditated

 


It’s Your Turn to Invite Change

Which categories in your life are you looking to change? What is one thing you can do today that will bring you closer to that goal? With this in mind, what will you be glad you did today? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 


How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, planning, or inviting positive change? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – local feel with a global reach.

Please email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or schedule a Discovery Call. Change is possible, especially with support.

 

 
 
3 Ways Blissful Lingering Has a Positive Effect on Managing Your Time

What pace are you traveling as you transition seasons and greet the summer? Are you slowing down and taking time off for vacation? Or are you quickly filling your days to the point of exhaustion and overwhelm? Your pace directly correlates to how well you manage your time and enjoy life.

Whether or not you’re on vacation, you can integrate regular pauses during your week. Without breaks or stops, you become less efficient and productive. With moments to restore and refresh, the quality of your decisions improves. Pacing matters, especially if you want to let go of the extraneous and become more organized. Give yourself the best chance for success. Activate the power of lingering.

How can lingering increase happiness and make you a better time manager? While it may sound counterintuitive, lingering presents an opportunity for a mindful break while focusing on something enjoyable and restorative. Lingering lets you pause, appreciate, and slow down moments. You can then return to your day with a renewed focus on what you’re doing next.

 




 

Monthly Meditation and Writing Retreat

Most months, I participate in an inspiring virtual retreat led by my wonderful friend and Clarity Coach, Yota Schneider. She creates a safe, supportive space for women to gather, meditate, write, and share.

Several months ago, the retreat’s theme was “linger.” After our meditation, I wrote this passage during our free-write. It illustrates several ways lingering has had a positive effect on my life.

 

Thoughts About Lingering

Wet paws, conversations, and gelato. Those probably aren’t the first things that come to mind when you think of linger. However, as I calmed myself in the darkness, the faint sounds of train horns blowing juxtaposed with coyotes howling and the clock ticking. Wet paws, conversations, and gelato lingered in my mind.

Lingering is about time – the stretching, expanding, and slowing down of moments. While lingering can be thought of positively and negatively, happy stories and memories surfaced for me tonight.

 

Wet Paws

First, the wet paws. Our beautiful black lab, Norton, now long gone, loved going on forest walks with us. We often walked (the five of us – Steve, me, the girls, and Norton) down our block to the path in the woods that led to the Croton River. We’d go to this one spot where we climbed on the big flat rocks – each taking a seat.  We’d sit barefoot with feet dangling in the water as we watched the river flow and heard its thunderous sound. Sun rays coming through the canopy of trees warmed us.

Norton, like us, picked his rock and submerged his front paws in the river. We lingered – each enjoying this beautiful time with no agenda and nowhere to go as if time stood still. And then, for unknown reasons, Norton would get up and decide it was time to leave. So we did. The lingering was over.

  

Conversations

Second – conversations.  I’ve been missing my mom and two aunts (my mom’s younger sisters) a lot lately. We talked often. Our conversations meandered. Time felt like taffy – stretching and unending. We talked about love, family, and matters of the heart. We laughed, cried, and enjoyed our time together as we lingered leisurely and easily in free-flowing conversations.

The conversations with these three amazing women have ended—at least the out-loud ones have, as they are all gone.

  

Lingering has restorative powers when you focus energy on positive moments.
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Gelato

Lastly, gelato. I recently had a gelato ice cream cone experience that I didn’t want to end. I tried to linger as long as possible while eating it. But you know how gelato goes—it melts, so my lingering time was limited.

But as I ate this delicious mocha gelato in a cone drenched in freshly dipped warm dark chocolate, I stretched out the enjoyment for as long as possible.

Linger. To linger. Lingering. The precious moments time offers. The beautiful moments I allow myself to savor.

Wet paws, conversations, and gelato.

Lingering has restorative powers when you focus energy on positive moments. Do you linger? If so, have you noticed helpful effects on your well-being or time management? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

If you want help letting go, organizing, or managing your time better so you can enjoy life more, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or schedule a Discovery Call.  Change is possible, especially with support.