Posts tagged negative self-talk
How One Small Change Can Help Reduce Overwhelm and Boost Task Activation

There are two challenges related to change that many of my clients face. The most common reason is overwhelm, often because the changes they seek are significant. Overwhelm can happen when you:

  • Have difficulty deciding where to start

  • Want to make multiple changes

  • Are unsure whether what you want to accomplish is possible

  • Engage in negative self-talk or unhelpful loops and scripts

  • Are uncertain how you’ll have time to make the changes you seek

The second most common challenge is task activation. My clients often know what to do, yet struggle to take action. They may experience low mood, boredom with the task, self-doubt, exhaustion, or difficulty managing their time.

The good news is that even when you’re feeling overwhelmed and having difficulty activating, things can shift quickly in a positive direction. I’ve seen this happen consistently with my clients, and it’s inspiring to be part of.

Are you curious about how to shift from overwhelm to hope and from stuckness to action? If so, keep reading to learn a few helpful strategies.

 

 

Change Strategies That Work When You’re Feeling Overwhelmed and Stuck

Strategy 1: Go Small

You know the phrase, “Think big?” For the first strategy, do the exact opposite. Instead of focusing on all the changes you want to make, go small, really small. This shift creates a boundary.

Let’s say you want to edit and organize all the rooms in your home. The goal is doable, but the enormity of those tasks feels overwhelming. For now, set aside thinking about the big picture and focus on a single, small piece.

For example, you want to edit and organize your clothes, which are stored in many rooms, dressers, and closets. Select one small area to begin, such as a drawer, a shelf, a closet rod, or a bag stuffed in the basement. Anywhere is OK as long as the area is small.

You’ll notice almost immediately that your mood begins to regulate because you’ve contained the organizing task to something more manageable. Overwhelm and anxiety subside when you set boundaries around your area of focus.

 

 

Strategy 2: Engage in What’s Doable

Combine the first strategy, going small, with this next one. As you can imagine, it’s not enough to create a tinier boundary and shift your mindset. It must be paired with an action or task. By reducing stress and cortisol surges, activation becomes possible. You can calmly face your task.

Here’s the magic. Making progress on that one small thing has a wonderfully positive effect. Your thoughts transform from “I can’t do this” to “I’m getting it done!” Your mood shifts from blocked and negative to lighter, more energetic, and more excited about taking on more.

  

Overwhelm and anxiety subside when you set boundaries around your area of focus.
— Linda Samuels. CPO-CD®, CVOP™

 

Strategy 3: Enlist Help

The first two strategies are effective. However, if you’re ready for change and still feel unable to move forward, it’s time for the third option: Ask for help. This can come from a nonjudgmental friend, family member, or professional organizer like me. You don’t have to do this alone.

My clients recognize that having a partner on their organizing journey is the secret sauce. They appreciate ongoing support, discussions of solutions and challenges, help with decision-making, a thought partner, and encouragement.

Some recent client organizing tasks included:

  • Decluttering the dining room table

  • Refining a project management system

  • Editing several bags of shirts

  • Sorting and releasing old business files from a shelf

  • Editing and letting go of a box of electronic material

For all of these projects, my clients’ starting point was feeling overwhelmed and unable to act. However, by narrowing the scope, focusing on one small part at a time, and enlisting external support, they improved their mood, accomplished a specific task, boosted their confidence, and were motivated to do more.

 


 

Why Does a Tiny Change Matter?

Small shifts are doable and sustainable. When you think about change, it can feel overwhelming, especially when the changes are big. However, by adjusting your mindset, narrowing the scope, and enlisting help, you can make progress. What helps you when you feel overwhelmed? How do you work with task activation? What resonates with you?

I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 

 

 

How Can I Help?

Do you feel overwhelmed, disorganized, or paralyzed? Do you seek change, yet feel stuck? I’m here to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – Local feel with a global reach.

Let’s connect! I’m easy to reach.

Embracing change and getting organized are possible, especially with support.

 
 
3 Helpful Things I Learned That Will Benefit My Virtual Organizing Clients

Attending organizing conferences is one of the highlights of my year. I learn interesting things, dedicate time to professional growth, connect with dear colleagues, and meet new people.

I just got back from the Institute for Challenging Disorganization’s (ICD) conference in Atlanta. Colleagues came from all over the United States and around the world, including Canada, Mexico, Spain, the Netherlands, and New Zealand. We learned together from experts on decision-making, time management, ADHD, autism, hoarding disorder, aging, dementia, and more.

Earlier this month, I participated in a meditation and writing retreat led by my dear friend and life coach, Yota Schneider. She shared a quote from John O’Donohue that feels relevant to the ideas I’m about to share. He said, “Nothing opens up the mind like the glimpse of new possibility.”

It’s the “glimpse” of what is possible that fosters hope and encourages change for my virtual organizing clients. I hope what I’m about to share will also be relevant and helpful for you.

 

 

 

 

3 Helpful Things I Learned at the Organizing Conference That Can Benefit You

1. Decision-Making Takes Energy

Melissa Gratias and Linda Samuels

Getting and staying organized requires making lots of decisions. One of the conference sessions about the brain and decision-making was presented by productivity expert, colleague, and fellow blogger, Melissa Gratias, PhD. She said, “The more choices, the more cognitively taxing.”  

In another session on chronic disorganization and aging, Beth Nolan, PhD, a gerontology expert, also discussed decision-making. She mentioned that one way we can help our clients with decision-making is by “being aware of the energy it takes.” Decision fatigue can become even more pronounced when compensating for physical changes or conditions.

Making decisions is an integral part of most virtual organizing sessions. I provide support to my clients and consider their energy level as they:

  • Weigh various options

  • Choose what to keep or release

  • Decide what step is next

  • Select what to include or exclude from their schedules


 

2. Change Barriers Can Be Overcome

Linda Samuels and Cameron Gott

Change was another topic that surfaced throughout the conference. In the session on tools to help your ADHD clients with their organizing goals, presented by Executive ADHD Coach, trainer, podcast host, author, and friend, Cameron Gott, PCC, he spoke about change.

Cam said there are many barriers to change, especially when ADHD is in the mix. The “ADHD hard place” exists in the space between being aware of the issues and actualizing the change you seek. Some of these ‘change’ barriers include:

  • Engaging in negative self-talk

  • Having lots of rules

  • Having difficulty prioritizing

  • Being challenged with activating

  • Experiencing a lack of focus

  • Getting easily distracted

One of the tools Cam suggested is using curiosity to bring about change. However, curiosity can also act as a barrier to change. As a barrier, it can appear as:

  • Doing endless research

  • Going down rabbit holes

  • Engaging in time sucks

However, Cam said you can reframe curiosity as a resource. He said, “Bring curiosity to a dilemma.” This will help you focus and take a more proactive approach.

While my virtual organizing clients desire change, they often face internal and external obstacles. However, with support and accountability, we work together to identify these challenges and try different ways to overcome them.

 

Bring curiosity to a dilemma.
— Cameron Gott, PCC

  

3. Connection is Essential

Carrie M. Lane

The last conference session, “Qualitative Research, Connective Labor & Professional Organizing,” was presented by Carrie Lane, PhD, an anthropologist and author of More Than Pretty Boxes – How the Rise of Professional Organizing Shows Us the Way We Work Isn’t Working.

“Connective labor,” which is “work that relies on empathy, human interaction, and mutual recognition,” was one of the ideas Carrie discussed. She referenced her friend’s book, The Last Human Job, written by Allison Pugh, a sociologist and author.

Carrie reminded us that “Our job as organizers requires the human connection – an intimate, nonjudgmental connection.”

While technology and AI keep advancing into our daily lives in many ways, nothing can replace human interaction and connection. I value the relationship I have with my clients. By building trust, showing compassion, and remaining nonjudgmental, I provide support as they work on growth and positive change.

 

 

  

Decision-Making, Change, Connection, and Virtual Organizing

There are many ways I support my virtual organizing clients. Are you struggling with making decisions, creating change, or feeling disconnected from others? What becomes possible when you get the help you need? Which ideas resonate most with you?

I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 

 

 

How Can I Help?

Do you feel overwhelmed, stuck, or disorganized? I’m here to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – Local feel with a global reach.

Let’s talk. I’m easy to reach.

Getting organized is possible, especially with support.

 
 
One Insightful Question to Bring a Joyful Balance into Your Life

The holidays are quite the time of year. The twinkling lights decorating the landscape cue us to this season of giving, celebrating, and reflecting.

You might be finishing this year’s projects or beginning new ones to continue in the new year. While joy-inducing opportunities are abundant, balancing the holidays, work life, personal plans, and life maintenance responsibilities can be stressful.

There are many ways to bring calm and balance into your life, and I’ve written extensively about them.

Recently, I read something valuable and relevant from James Clear, which I’ll share with you. I hope you find it helpful as you navigate your balance this season.

 

 



First, The Back Story

Are you familiar with James Clear’s “3-2-1 Thursday” newsletter? Each issue includes three of his short ideas, two quotes from others, and one question to consider. One of my clients told me about it, and I signed up immediately. I enjoy receiving his weekly wisdom in its easily digestible format.

 

  

Two Simple Rules

In a recent newsletter, Clear shared this:

“Two simple rules:

  1. You get better at what you practice.

  2. Everything is practice.”

He encourages observing yourself and others to notice what we’re practicing. He reminds us that where you focus is a choice. For example, are you practicing…

  • “Getting mad on social media?”

  • “The fine art of noticing how they have been wronged?”

  • Stressing over being stressed?

  • Saying “yes” to the point of being overscheduled?

  • Not following through on commitments?

  • Engaging in negative self-talk?

  • Not sleeping enough?

  • Accumulating more stuff?

 

 

One Insightful Question

Bringing awareness to your practices is essential for changing where your time and energy go. Clear asks, “What are you practicing?”

Do you want to “get better” at nourishing practices? If so, focus on those while reducing harmful ones.

What are you practicing?
— James Clear

Here are several of my recent practices:

 

Which Practices Will Bring You More Balance?

You have an opportunity to create a better balance this season. What will you focus on during the last few weeks of the year? Which practices can you let go of that no longer serve you? Which ones do you want to invite in?

You have choices. I’m excited to see how this idea can shift your balance. I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 

 

How Can I Help?

Do you want support decluttering, organizing, planning, or creating more balance? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – A local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Organization, balance, and ease are possible, especially with support.

 
 
How 3 Useful Changes Can Make Positive Differences in Your Life

Proactive change is a fascinating thing. It’s the type of change you seek when you desire a shift in your life. You might have identified an area you want to improve, a behavior you want to stop, or a wish you want to manifest. You are ready for a transformation but may feel overwhelmed with where to begin or what to focus on. Change is possible through desire, small steps, and support.

This week, I attended the educationally stimulating ICD Virtual Conference, “Shining a Spotlight on ADHD.” There were three terrific speakers- Melanie Sobocinski, PhD, PCC, Sharon Saline, Psy.D, and Ari Tuckman, PsyD, MBA. They shared a wealth of information. I’m focusing on three ideas I learned about change that I thought would be especially helpful.

 

3 Useful Changes

1. Task Activation

Have you ever wondered why a task isn’t happening? In Melanie Sobocinski’s presentation, Mastering the ADHD Trifecta to Manage Task Salience, she said the key to activation hinges on using strategies in three areas:

  • High Interest – May need to be boosted or toned down

  • Urgency – Can be overused, but can be beneficial when used in small doses

  • Other People – Can provide support, including focus and problem-solving, or can be an obstacle if it erodes the client’s autonomy

Task activation can be improved by understanding which elements are interfering. While Melanie shared excellent strategies for each area, there was one for High Interest that caught my attention.

To boost “Interest,” you can introduce novelty with a micro-change. Melanie shared a worksheet by Casey Dixon, PCC, who defines micro-change as “the smallest possible change you can make to have a task or solution feel new again.” These tiny changes will “catch your brain’s attention and help a task feel fresher and more rewarding, without creating utter chaos.”

Use Micro-Change to Introduce Novelty

  • Try a new tool or resource, such as a new app.

  • Change your location or placement of objects, like working at a coffee shop.

  • Select a new color for writing with or on.

  • Use a new sound for alarms.

  • Adjust your position or lighting by walking during a call or switching the lighting intensity.

 

2. Confidence Formation

Have you ever felt nervous, anxious, or lacked confidence in social situations? Are you curious about one strategy that can change your experience? In Sharon Saline’s presentation, Strategies and Solutions for Social Anxiety in Neurodivergent Adults, she described social anxiety disorder as a “debilitating fear or judgment, humiliation, or rejection.” There can be a “disconnect between how a person actually appears to others and their own exaggerated perception of themselves.”

Sharon delved into Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), Perfectionism, and Imposter Syndrome. One of the strategies she offered when discussing Imposter Syndrome was to develop and name your “inner ally.” Negative self-talk can run rampant. Call upon your inner ally to provide support, compassion, and belief when you’re feeling nervous, doubtful, or ruminating with unhelpful thoughts. Sharon calls her ally “Tina Trailblazer.” What name will you give yours? What words of support will they offer?

While I haven’t named my ally or identified her as such, I have relied this year on my 2024 motto to lift me when I run into a challenge. Her voice says, “You got this.” Those words help me get over myself and move forward with confidence. After learning about the inner ally concept, I feel inspired to give my ally a name.

Yes starts the process of change; Yet keeps it going.
— Sharon Saline, Psy.D.

3. Sleep Foundation

Do you get enough sleep? Is that an area of your life you want to change and improve? Ari Tucker’s presentation was ADHD Makes Sleep Worse – And We Probably All Need More Sleep. He said, “No one is bringing their A-game after a bad night of sleep.”  

Lack of sleep negatively impacts mood, efficiency, effectiveness, focus, and attention. Consider how you feel after good or bad sleep days. There are many solutions for sleep deprivation, which include establishing a consistent bedtime, limiting caffeine, minimizing kid and pet disruptions, or stopping naps. For more strategies, read Ari’s ADDitude article, 9 Sleep Deprivation Solutions for Adults with ADHD.

While there are numerous ways to address good sleep hygiene, Ari suggests focusing first on quantity. If you establish the ‘right’ number of sleep hours you need, the quality of your sleep will probably be fine. If the quantity of sleep is good and you’re still having sleep challenges, then it’s worth investigating your sleep quality. Talking with a doctor who can advise about any medical challenges affecting your sleep could be beneficial.

Small changes in your sleep habits can significantly improve your daily experience.  

Partial progress is still progress.
— Ari Tuckman, Psy.D.

Which ideas resonated with you? Are there areas of change you want to focus on? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

If you want guidance with the changes you desire, I’m here to help. Please email me at linda@ohsoorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or click here to schedule a Discovery Call. Change is doable, especially with support.