Posts tagged momentum
How a Fantastic Conference Taught Me More About Virtual Organizing

Recently, I returned from the Institute for Challenging Disorganization’s (ICD) conference, held in Canada this year. Colleagues from around the globe gathered to learn, connect, and explore the latest ideas and research related to neurodivergence and people affected by chronic disorganization.

The conference covered a fascinating range of topics, including ADHD, decision-making, navigating life transitions, clutter, emotional labor, hoarding disorder, motivational interviewing, and communication.

I was thrilled to be part of the panel, “Cultivating Connection: Best Practices for Communication with Neurodivergent Clients,” alongside my wonderful colleagues. Sara Skillen moderated, and Leslie Josel and Elizabeth Brink were the other panelists.

Whenever I’m learning, I have one goal: to learn at least one new thing, discover one new resource, or deepen my connection with something I already know. Honestly, with that simple goal, I consistently come away with far more than one thing.

The ICD conference was no exception.

I’m excited to share some of my takeaways and how they expanded my thinking, reinforced what I already know, and will influence the virtual organizing work I do with clients.

 

What Expanded My Thinking About Virtual Organizing

Emotional Labor

In “The Art of the Invisible: Helping Neurodiverse Families Navigate the Emotional Labor Lifecycle,” presenters Regina Lark, PhD, CPO®, CPO-CD® and Leslie Josel, PCC, discussed how emotional labor, which is mostly invisible and disproportionately handled by moms, is “the exhausting work” and the “cognitive management of household systems.”

Navigating emotional labor, work that never ends, requires executive function (EF) skills that rely heavily on the prefrontal cortex. These include:

  • Planning

  • Focusing

  • Remembering instructions

  • Juggling multiple tasks

  • Managing emotions

  • Working memory

  • Organizing

However, as many of my clients have experienced, EF skills can be especially challenging if you are highly stressed, have prefrontal cortex damage, or have conditions such as ADHD, autism, dyslexia, dyspraxia, or Tourette’s syndrome.

One of the biggest takeaways was distributing the emotional load through “radical delegation. Take perfection off the table. Delegate to someone else, even if they aren’t good at it.  Go for “good enough.”

This made me think differently about virtual organizing. When we work together, we’re not only organizing possessions or creating systems. We’re also considering the mental load behind those systems. What decisions are constantly being made? What is someone trying to remember? What are they managing for themselves or others? And what might be possible to let go of, share, or accept as “good enough”?

Life Transitions

We experience many life transitions. Professor and researcher Dr. Michelle Pannor Silver focused on four in her presentation, “Unpacking Identity: Navigating Later Life Transitions for Those with Organizational Challenges.” She discussed retirement, menopause, clutter, and prioritizing physical resilience.

Much of my work involves helping clients navigate transitions such as moving, starting a new job, divorce, birth, losing a loved one, and other life changes like those Dr. Silver discussed.

One takeaway came from the retirement section. Since our identities are often tied to our work, figuring out what comes next takes thought. Silver stressed the importance of creating “time and mental space to imagine retirement.” It’s not just about getting your finances in order. Take time to envision how you want your post-work life to feel and what you want it to be like. Include “sparking joy” activities.

Another idea that resonated was “recalibrating after loss.” In later years, loss can arrive in many forms, including changes in work status, moving from a familiar environment, changes in physical or cognitive abilities, and the loss of loved ones.

I am thinking differently about virtual organizing in the context of reimagining and recalibrating life. We go through periods when the organizational systems or patterns that used to work suddenly become ineffective. They no longer support who we are now. Virtual organizing sessions can be a wonderful way to work through these shifts and create systems and schedules that support who you are now.

“Decision-making is at the center of everything. It is a core part of being human.”
— Elizabeth Brink, PCC, PCNC®, SEP®

What Reinforced What I Already Know About Virtual Organizing

ADHD

Ari Tuckman, PsyD, MBA, presented “ADHD Can Make Organizing Psychologically Messy.” He emphasized that the ADHD challenge is “not the knowing, but the doing.” Challenges with activation, attention regulation, perfectionism, and time management can make it harder to start. You might know what to do, but these obstacles can make it challenging to get things done.

One question Tuckman suggested was, “What’s a realistic, sustainable goal that you’ll allow yourself to feel good about?” Emphasizing “realistic” and “sustainable” is central to my work with clients.

Tuckman shared many strategies that reinforced the tools and concepts I use with clients. They included:

  • Time – Use analog clocks, alarms, and schedules to build time awareness and make time more visible.

  • Fun – Make tasks less boring and more enjoyable through gamification or a playful spin.

  • Clarify – Ask, “How important is ‘this’ relative to everything else?”

  • Momentum – Do a “bit of something,” and always “hope for momentum.”

  • Experiment – “Be willing to flounder, and be confused.”

  • Decision-Making– If you are having difficulty choosing, flip a coin. It can clarify what you really want.

  • Perfectionism – Focus on “good enough.”

These strategies reflect what I see every day in virtual organizing: knowing what to do and being able to do it aren’t always the same. Virtual organizing sessions can help clients identify what gets in the way, experiment with different approaches, and find strategies that are realistic and sustainable for them.

Decision-Making

Elizabeth Brink, PCC, PCNC®, SEP®, a neurodivergent-centered coach, educator, and trainer, presented “Decision-Making: Neurodivergence, Trauma, and Chronic Disorganization.” Brink stated, “Decision-making is at the center of everything. It is a core part of being human.”

Brink went on to say that “Decision-making is a special kind of hard for neurodivergent humans.” She also said that for neurodivergent people, “Overwhelm is a reasonable response to decision-making.”

When Brink said, “It’s a big deal how to help people make decisions,” I recognized how central nurturing decision-making skills and building agency are to my virtual organizing work. People reach out to me when they feel overwhelmed, and much of that overwhelm comes from difficulty making decisions.

Decision-making skills can be learned. Brink featured several skill-building strategies that align with how I support my clients in making decisions. They include:

  • Empathy – Understand and appreciate what they may be feeling or experiencing, without judgment.

  • Demystify – Learn how they make decisions, what’s worked well for them in the past, the process they’ve used, and how we can tweak or apply that process to current choices.

  • Capacity – Be mindful of their capacity at that moment, normalize pauses, take breaks to avoid decision fatigue, and encourage a slower pace when needed.

Always Be Learning

Every conference leaves me with something to think about, but this one reminded me why I value learning so much. Sometimes a new idea changes how I approach my work. Other times, it gives me language for what I already know and see in my work with clients. Both are valuable.

I’m excited to bring these insights into my virtual organizing sessions and stay curious, experiment, and learn alongside my clients.

How Can I Help?

Do you feel overwhelmed, stuck, or disorganized? You don’t have to face it alone. I’m here to help! Get unstuck and make progress. Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward—with a local feel and a global reach.

Let’s talk! I’m easy to reach.

Getting organized, making progress, and reaching your goals are doable, especially with support.

 
 
How to Use a Simple Way to Get Unstuck and Spark Motivation Now

Feeling stuck is something everyone experiences. It can also take a toll on motivation. Have you felt this way lately?

There can be many reasons you might feel at a standstill, such as:

  • Overwhelm from a big or complex project

  • Perfectionism and the belief that you have to do it “the right way”

  • Decision fatigue that leaves you with little capacity to act

  • Unclear about what to do next

  • Lack of accountability or support

  • Unrealistic expectations about what can be accomplished

  • Fear of failure, success, or making the wrong decision

  • Waiting until you feel motivated

Do any of these sound familiar, or is there another reason holding you back?

 

 

 

The “I Can’t” Mindset

When you get stuck, something psychological can happen. Instead of feeling a sense of agency and believing you will figure things out and move forward, you focus on what isn’t possible or what you can’t do.

The “I Can’t” mindset could be what’s keeping you stuck. You might ruminate or focus on messages like:

  • “This project is so big. I’ll never get it done.”

  • “I don’t know where to start.”

  • “I don’t have the time.”

  • “I don’t have the energy.”

  • “It’s impossible for me to get organized.”

  • “I’ll never catch up.”

  • “I’m afraid I’ll make the wrong decision.”

  • “I need to feel motivated first.”

Are any of these phrases ones you ‘hear’ yourself say? Identifying your unique “I Can’t” provides valuable insight into what’s keeping you blocked.

 

 

 

The Shift That Unlocks You, Builds Momentum, and Sparks Motivation

Mindset is everything. It can make all the difference in how you experience life and in what you do or don’t do. One way to take control of the narrative that hasn’t been working for you is to change the dialogue.

Instead of focusing on what’s not possible or your “I Can’t” list, use one of these possibility-infused questions to work its magic. Some options include:

  • What’s one small step I can take right now?

  • What’s possible today?

  • What’s one thing I can do in the next five minutes?

  • What’s good enough for today?

  • What would make this a little easier?

And if you want an elegantly simple question, here’s one from James Clear that I love:

“What can I do?”

Ask a possibility-focused question to immediately shift your mindset toward a more positive, proactive one. 

“What can I do?”
— James Clear

The Choice Is Yours

It doesn’t feel good to be stuck. Your internal dialogue strongly shapes whether you stay stuck or move forward. Pay attention to the messages you tell yourself. You have the power to shift the dialogue from “I can’t” to “I can.”

Which phrases help or hurt you? How could a shift in mindset benefit you? How would that shift help you get unstuck? In what ways would it help build your motivation? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 

 

How Can I Help?

Do you feel overwhelmed, disorganized, and stuck? Are you struggling with a lack of motivation? I’m here to help! You don’t have to do this alone. Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – Local feel with a global reach.

Let’s talk! I’m easy to reach.

Getting organized, cultivating motivation, and reaching your goals are possible, especially with support.

 
 
5 Life Lessons I Learned About Patience and Promising Progress

Recently, I reread the first blog post I wrote on waiting. As humans, waiting is something we do, yet we’re not always happy about it. We want things to happen quickly, effortlessly, and painlessly. However, things don’t often go that way. Our patience gets tested as waiting can be a challenging experience.

Maybe you’re working toward a big goal that might take months, years, or even decades. Perhaps your energy is low, and progress looks different from what it did earlier in your life. You might also lack clarity about your goal or what your next step will be.

Developing your internal resources, including patience, resilience, and agency, can be beneficial. You can also enlist help from external resources, such as haulers, handymen, trade specialists, a coach, a therapist, or a professional organizer like myself.

Progress is possible. Reaching your goals is doable. Gathering the resources to get there is essential.

Over the past few months, my husband and I have been working on some home projects. They have taken different amounts of time to complete, and some are still ongoing. The biggest obstacles were setting priorities and managing time constraints. To finish these projects, we had to decide that they were still important enough to pursue. Once we agreed on that, we scheduled the time to complete them. The scheduling was pivotal. Without planning and scheduling, nothing would have happened.

During the process, I reaffirmed and learned a few things. Hopefully, some of these will resonate with you and be useful as you pursue your goals and projects.

 

 

5 Life Lessons I Learned About Patience and Promising Progress

Life Lesson #1:  I can tolerate discomfort.

I love the final result when we improve our home. It’s hard for me to tolerate the temporary chaos that happens. Stuff gets pulled out of place, messes spread to multiple areas, and order and organization are disrupted.

I often tell my clients that things usually get worse before they get better. When you’re organizing a closet, for example, and things are pulled out, it doesn’t look great. But as you start editing, rerouting, discarding, and donating, clarity begins to emerge. Once you organize the “keepers,” everything looks and feels better. However, there's a tipping point in the middle of the project where discomfort can surface.

Even though I’m happy when we’re fixing things, I tend to feel more anxious and stressed when we’re in reno mode. That discomfort motivates me to finish what we started as soon as possible. Interestingly, I can easily handle disorder in spaces I don’t live in. But in my own home, I prefer a certain level of order, calmness, and predictability.

Although I prefer not to be uncomfortable, I am capable of tolerating discomfort. This is especially true when it’s temporary or for a good reason. Acknowledging this made me feel less stressed and more accepting of the chaos.

 

 

Life Lesson #2: I can transform temporary chaos into an opportunity to reimagine.

One of the benefits of taking things apart is having time to edit, question, and reimagine. We recently disrupted our entryway to spackle, paint, and do some electrical work. Doing that allowed me to let go of some things and reimagine the placement of certain items, like my Pez collection and one of the rugs.

I also felt inspired to repaint three of the cabinets. One is a big project, which I’ll wait to do in warmer weather. The other two cabinets will be done soon. Without being open to chaos and committing to the entryway project, these other projects might not move forward.

Chaos doesn’t have to be negative. It can be an opportunity to bring positive changes. The temporary chaos stirred my creativity and desire to make more improvements.

 

 

 

Life Lesson #3: I can finish what I start when I prioritize and plan.

This might seem obvious, but when you want to accomplish something, whether it’s organizing, home improvement, or changing a habit, dedicating time and energy to it is essential.

Deciding that something is a priority is the first step. This may involve temporarily setting other things aside while you focus your resources on the main goal. After all, you can accomplish a lot, but not all at once. Something has to give.

Once you've identified your priority, the next step is to schedule and plan dedicated time to work on it. For us, that meant working several evenings and weekends. Again, without blocking out specific calendar dates, it would not have been completed.

I can wish all I want, but without making it a priority and including it in a scheduled plan, it’s unlikely to happen. There is great potential and power in recognizing what I’m capable of when I prioritize and plan.

“I can tolerate discomfort.”
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Life Lesson #4: I can feel the joy and satisfaction that come with progress.

Done is great, but so is progress. No goal happens with one step. Progress happens one step, one action, and one commitment at a time. When working on the renovation projects, Steve and I took a moment to appreciate the progress along the way.

Momentum is a powerful force. Taking action motivates you to do more. Experiencing progress encourages further movement. Progress is satisfying and joy-inducing.

Steve and I made sure to see, feel, talk about, and celebrate the progress we've made. It was no small feat to get some of these projects started. We embraced the positive feelings that came with making progress.

Do you know the expression, “Stop and smell the roses?” For this one, let’s pause and celebrate the progress. You took action and worked hard. Now, enjoy it!

 

  

Life Lesson #5: I can be awed by my bad-ass husband.

After 42 years of marriage, I am still amazed by my husband. He is a talented man who, among his many skills, knows how to cook, play the drums, coordinate large-scale architectural woodworking projects, and handle almost any type of home improvement or repair project. He’s also a devoted volunteer, a great listener, a wonderful father, and an incredible husband and life partner.

Whether he was finishing the glass tiles in the bathroom, doing electrical work, plumbing, cutting through walls, spackling the ceiling, or painting surfaces, he not only knew what to do but also had the right tools to do it. He also taught me how to do some things, so we could work together on projects. I love that!

I am constantly inspired by Steve’s work ethic, humanity, skills, design sense, dedication, and talent. He was willing to let go of perfection to do his best and finish projects. I’m grateful for and in awe of the incredible human he is. Thank you, Honey!

 

  

 

How Do Patience and Progress Manifest for You?

Patience, or the lack of it, is part of being human. In fact, impatience can sometimes drive progress. When you feel stuck, progress may seem out of reach. However, leaning into that urge to move forward and pushing your patience to its limit can be one way to make progress. Prioritizing and planning are also helpful. What helps you move ahead?

Which ideas resonate most with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 

 

 

How Can I Help?

Are you ready to make progress? Do you feel overwhelmed, stuck, or disorganized? I’m here to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – Local feel with a global reach.

Let’s talk. I’m easy to reach.

Getting organized and making progress is possible, especially with support.

 
 
5 Ways to Easily See What's Possible by Finding Solutions to Your Challenges

Are there many things you want to experience, explore, or accomplish in life? If so, that’s wonderful. However, when you encounter daily challenges, it becomes harder to think about the future and imagine possibilities.

You have the capacity to handle a lot. You can boost your capacity by identifying and addressing a specific challenge you’re facing. Often, just one small tweak is enough to create momentum and open the path for new ideas you couldn’t see before.

Why is that? It’s easy to get stuck in cycles of distress, overwhelm, and frustration. These patterns can cause paralysis and inaction. When you’re in that negative mode, your mind can spiral or shut down. Thinking and dreaming about new possibilities feels out of reach.

There are many ways to open up the ‘what’s possible’ path. Depending on your preferences and situation, choose the strategy that will be most effective for you.

 

 

 

5 Ways to Easily See What’s Possible by Finding Solutions to Your Challenges

1. Identify the Hiccups

One of my favorite methods to prepare for possibilities is by making a list of the hiccups you encounter during your day.

Pay close attention as you go through your day. As situations occur, write down anything that causes you stress, distress, or inconvenience. These might include things like:

  • Misplaced or lost keys, glasses, or your phone.

  • Had trouble getting dressed because of clutter in the closet.

  • Created an overly complicated organizational system that’s too difficult to maintain.

  • Had supplies tumble out of the bathroom cabinet every time it was opened.

  • Was late for an appointment again.

  • Ran out of milk, toilet paper, apples, or other household staples.

  • Was annoyed during kitchen meal prep because things weren’t organized in a useful way.

  • Woke up cranky because of sleep disruptions or lack of sleep.

  • Began the day feeling anxious and unsure what to focus on.

Notice the hiccup. Write it down. Choose one of the challenges and fix the problem.

 

 

 

2. Quiet Your Mind

When the noise upstairs gets too loud and clouds your thoughts, it can prevent you from seeing possibilities. How can you quiet the mind so you can move forward with clarity and purpose?

There are many ways to do this, including:

  • Journaling

  • Meditating

  • Sipping coffee or tea from your favorite mug

  • Resting

  • Reading

  • Breathing slowly with focus and intention

  

 

 

3. Declutter the Desk

Numerous studies show how clutter can negatively affect our mental health and well-being. Not everyone is affected by clutter to the same degree. However, if clutter bothers you, you may actually feel its effects viscerally. You might feel anxious, stressed, agitated, or have difficulty concentrating or relaxing.

One of the easiest ways to change how you’re feeling is by decluttering a small area. It doesn’t matter what you choose. Pick something with distinct boundaries like a desk surface, a comfy chair, or a coffee table.

Remove items that don’t belong. Route the outtakes to the trash, recycling bin, donation box, or rehome them elsewhere. For the remaining items, decide whether you want them to stay, let them go, or relocate to another spot.

Clearing space and surfaces is calming. With this simple reset, you’ll be more open to possibilities. 

“The physical act of movement can encourage progress and possibilities in other areas of your life. ”
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

4. Move Your Body

Sitting is passive. Not only does it make your body stiff and less active, but it can also affect your energy level and mood. Since transitioning from in-person to virtual work, I sit much more than I used to.

Movement has become even more important. I make sure to take breaks between virtual organizing sessions to walk around, stretch, take bio breaks, or get some fresh air. When I’m on the phone, I often walk around the house while talking. I incorporate other movements by doing yoga, exercising, walking by the river or in the woods, running errands, gardening, sweeping, or cleaning.

Some movement is spontaneous, while some is more intentional. It helps when I schedule time to meet a friend for a walk or go to yoga class. That adds accountability and keeps me committed to moving more.

Physical movement creates its own momentum. The physical act of movement can encourage progress and possibilities in other areas of your life.

 

 

 

5. Ask for Help

Have you ever faced a challenge that overwhelmed you? When that happens, do you try to solve it on your own or ask for help? I usually try to figure things out myself first. However, there are times when hiring someone or seeking advice is beneficial.

Recently, I experienced some frustrating tech problems with Mailchimp and Square while setting up the backend for my December workshop. While customer support offered a few insights, they didn’t resolve the issue, so I hired someone to help me. It was incredible how much less stressed I felt knowing someone would help me find a solution and fix the problem. I didn’t have to do this alone. It was wonderful having the personalized support to troubleshoot the issue, discuss options I hadn’t considered, and resolve the problem. Thank you, Lana Kitcher!

As a professional organizer, I help my clients get unstuck and move forward. I love helping and serving others. It’s inspiring to see what becomes possible when obstacles are removed.

Sometimes the answer to a problem is asking for help. When you receive the support you need, your stress and overwhelm decrease. You become more available to take the next steps and imagine what is possible.

 

 

 

 

Will Finding Solutions Make You More Receptive to New Possibilities?

Everyone gets stuck sometimes. What happens next is what matters most. There are many options, which include identifying the challenge, decluttering a small area, or reaching out for help. What hiccups during your day are keeping you frustrated and stuck? What helps you feel receptive to new possibilities?

Which ideas resonate most with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 

 

  

 

How Can I Help?

Do you feel overwhelmed, stuck, or disorganized? I’m here to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – Local feel with a global reach.

Let’s talk. I’m easy to reach.

Getting organized and making progress is possible, especially with support.