We are still at the beginning of the New Year, yet we can embrace a fresh start at any time. You can begin again any moment, minute, hour, day, month, season, or year. Your attitude about ‘new’ can determine an optimistic or pessimistic start. 

While I feel incredibly energized in January, I also regularly experience a positive anticipatory sense at the beginning of each day. Most mornings when I wake, I am energized by the clean slate and promise a new day brings with its plans, surprises, and quiet moments that will unfold. 

To understand other views, I was curious what my thoughtful colleagues’ perspectives were about fresh starts and new beginnings. I reached out to this generous group – Al Bingham, Felice Cohen, Juliet Landau-Pope, Christine Li, and Yota Schneider. I asked them to respond to and elaborate on this prompt-

How do you make the most of a fresh start?

Their diverse responses include having no expectations to delving deeply. My deepest gratitude goes to this inspiring group for sharing their time, hearts, and wisdom with us.

5 Best Ideas to Help You Make a Promising Fresh Start

1. Remain Open

“I make the most of a fresh start by trying to have ZERO assumptions about what is going to happen. That way, I remain open to what might be and not wound up by what I might expect to happen when I often have no idea what might actually happen. When I have no assumptions or expectations going in, I can enjoy the process and the eventual outcome without having them mean anything negative about me — and that is a wonderful thing.” 

Christine Li, Ph.D. – Procrastination Coach, Clinical Psychologist, Make Time for Success podcast Host

 2. Stay Focused

“I think of every day as a fresh start, a new beginning, a new chance to get things done. To help make the day productive, each day starts with a clean To-Do list. A list offers steps to follow, guides you toward a goal, and keeps you on target to avoid falling down a TikTok rabbit hole. (Use TikTok as a reward for finishing a task on the list.) Every task completed, whether easy or time-consuming, motivates you toward completing another. Then another. Remember, you don’t have to get it all done today; there’s always tomorrow.”

Felice Cohen – Author, Speaker, Professional Organizer

3. Be Present

“Faced with a fresh challenge, it’s tempting to look back, reviewing previous efforts and setbacks. Or perhaps to project into the future, speculating on possible outcomes. While there’s much to be learned from looking back and forward, both drive you into your head, fuelling fears and fantasies rather than forward into action. No wonder over-thinking is a common cause of procrastination. If you aim to boost motivation, adopt a more mindful approach to your present situation. Focus on what matters most, right here, right now. Then identify the very first step and take the leap.”

Juliet Landau-Pope MA, PG Cert AP, CPCC, FRSA – Productivity Coach, Virtual Organizer

“We are still at the beginning of a New Year, yet we can embrace a fresh start at any time.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

 4. Manifest Attention

“During the big reveal on makeover shows, the heroes don’t endlessly harp on how lousy things were before. Instead, there are tears of joy, wonder, gratitude, and love for the fresh start they’re receiving. Discomfort and dismay may provide sparks that light the desire for change, but they're a lousy fuel source for enacting it. A fresh start involves three primal actions: bringing something forward, organizing it, and releasing something. Each needs careful attention. Love, wonder, and gratitude helps keep things roaring. When these ‘ends’ inform your ‘means,’ your awareness remains open to finding novel paths forward during the refresh process!” 

Al Bingham, e-RYT500, YACEP, FAFS – Yoga Teacher, Author

 5. Nurture Reflection

"At the threshold of a new beginning, it is important to stay open, curious, and honest. If I don’t want old patterns repeating themselves, I have to decide what to leave behind and how to show up. I love taking long walks and drives and having intimate conversations with myself. I reflect on what I love about this fresh start. Then I ask, what are my fears? What habits, behaviors, beliefs, and attitudes could undermine me? Am I ready to let them go? What’s next? As answers and insights bubble up, I grow more confident, clear, and excited about the journey ahead."

Yota Schneider – Life Coach, Retreat Facilitator, Blogger

While January is almost over, there will be more opportunities for fresh starts. What helps you make the most of a fresh start? Are there specific periods you are more energized than others? Which ideas resonate most with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

What happens when you need to work, push, and get things done, yet you feel like doing the exact opposite? When needs and wants conflict, which one wins out? Are you able to let go? Do you forge ahead despite the competing feelings? Do you compromise? Do you listen to the voice that is pulling you in the ‘opposite’ direction? Does procrastination take hold?

As I’ve described before, my natural tendency is to push myself. It’s not that I’m always working. I’m not. I purposely take breaks, have work boundaries, and make time to not do. However, I can still be hard on myself. It’s this deep sense I have to continually strive and complete. It’s not necessarily a negative thing, but there are times, like now, when my usual mode of operating competes with the loss and grief I’m experiencing. My typically wider bandwidth feels much narrower these days. It is only a few weeks since my mom died, and I have less energy.

“I was willing to let go of my expectations and listen to what my heart and mind needed.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

I gifted myself a compromise. Instead of writing more, I’ll share a video of the places I’ve been exploring with you. I’ve enjoyed being outside in the spring air to walk, see, smell, capture, and experience its beauty and magnificence. It’s just what I needed. Seeing the Hudson Valley landscape green and burst with color again feels beautifully affirming and hopeful.

I was willing to let go of my expectations and listen to what my heart and mind needed. Quiet time with nature called. What have you let go of recently? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

There have been many words used to describe 2020. In a recent article in The Washington Post, readers offered their one word or phrase for the year, including “exhausting, lost, chaotic, relentless, heartbreaking, transformative, and the year of missing.” Perhaps the word that I heard (and possibly used) the most was unprecedented. It was that kind of year. We tried our best to navigate the unknown, find strength when life got worse than ever imagined, extend compassion and grace to ourselves and others, and find some balance in a continually changing situation. 

It’s been a harsh year, a year of struggle. We needed love, compassion, support, and connection more than ever. With pandemic restrictions reducing in-person contact, technology played a starring role to help us virtually spend time together. I blogged and had meaningful conversations with you throughout these past months, as we experienced and worked through this year together. We shared our silver linings and losses.

Being a reflective time of year, I am revisiting the past before moving ahead to the future. As part of the review, I selected highlights, one from each month, of the most compassionate organizing concepts of 2020. My hope is you discover a seed idea that will inspire your New Year. 

Where do you want to focus on creating the level of organization and balance that you desire? Which people and projects will receive your time, energy, and attention? 

12 Compassionate Organizing Concepts

Winter 2020

Fresh Start - How to Choose Words That Will Positively Affect Your Fresh Start

“Your life and success will not be defined by the nouns you choose. It will be defined by the verbs.”

— Todd Henry

Embrace Change - 3 New Ideas That Will Help Inspire Your Change

“If you’re not sure about the change you want to make, give yourself some ‘wander time’ and see what transpires.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Next Step - 7 Uplifting Discoveries That Will Help You Cope With Next

“Next might need to be a big dose of self-compassion. Or, perhaps it will be you reaching out to someone else that is hurting.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Spring 2020

Letting Go - How to Let Go of Guilt During the COVID-19 Crisis

“What expectations of normal am I letting go of today?”

— Rick Breden

Clutter - How to Release Mind Clutter That Makes You Worry

“Mind clutter worry is unproductive. And as it turns out, it’s a good teacher too.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Time Management - Are You Making Time for ‘The Good Stuff’?

“In your mix of doing, are you making time to notice and embrace the good stuff?”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Summer 2020

Motivation - Big Lesson I Learned How Motivation Is in The Growing

“Motivation is in the growing.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Enlisting Help - How to Get Help Setting and Celebrating Your Big Goals

“A goal doesn’t happen in a vacuum. We need help with accomplishing our goals and celebrating them along the way.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Mindfulness - How Do Mindfulness and Focus Remarkably Appear in Your Life?

“It is in the practice of shifting attention, awareness, and return that we become more mindful.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Fall 2020

Possibilities - 7 Valuable Lessons I Learned About Weddings, Hope, & Possibilities

“We live in challenging times. Yet even in the darkest days, there is hope. There is love. There are possibilities.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Wonderfully Human - How to Enjoy Pandemic-Time Holidays With More Gratitude and Creativity

“The initial sadness for not being able to gather has morphed into positive anticipation for the ways we’ve reimagined the holiday.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Life Balance - How to Effectively Balance the Extremes of Your Holiday Season

“Feeling balanced is a fluid and a continually shifting dynamic.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

My deepest gratitude goes to you for being an integral part of this vibrant community. We’ve had an incredible year of conversations and sharing. You bring learning, growth, support, and inspiration to every exchange. Thank you for coming back again and again to participate and share the best of who you are. 

What inspired you this year? Which compassionate organizing concept resonates most with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Madison Must Photography

As I sit down to write, thoughts of love, family, and a wedding swirl around my head and heart. Like a dream, I can’t believe that our youngest daughter, Cassie, married Matthew at our home one week ago. They exuded joy and love. We all felt it. By the end of the day, the back of my head ached from smiling so much. It was a good ache. There was so much love, a sense of wonderful possibilities, and hope for the future. Their celebration was a welcome bright spot in the midst of a challenging year.

My husband and I remained in the blissful wedding bubble for as long as we could. At this point, I have mostly returned to regular life. There are still a few flower bouquets reminding me that a wedding really did happen here, and some thank you notes to write. But other than that, my wedding tasks are complete, and the house is back to its pre-party state. What remains is this inner warmth from this significant time, images of tender moments, feelings of calm, and some lessons learned.

7 Lessons Learned from The Mother of the Bride

Communication

Shortly after Cassie and Matthew’s engagement last May, we started discussing the wedding. Right away, I realized we had different ideas and expectations. I recognized the importance of being open, listening, and remaining respectful of their wishes. After all, it was their wedding day. They chose to organize and handle most things and delegated some aspects to others, including me. We supported them in any way we could. Often that meant listening or offering ideas when asked. Keeping the lines of communication open was essential. 

Flexibility

A valuable life skill when making a wedding, especially during a pandemic, is flexibility. Change was the flavor of the day. The kids made plans and, because of the pandemic, had to alter them more than once. They remained flexible, and so did I. I’ll admit that I’m not naturally flexible and continue to work at it. The pandemic influenced a venue change, the wedding’s scope, the vendors, and the number of guests that could attend. Other changes happened that weren’t pandemic-related but required flexibility. Remaining nimble was a great coping strategy for all of us.

Madison Must Photography

Letting Go

As moms, we literally learn to let go from the moment our kids are born. They leave our bodies after being protectively housed for nine months. And that’s just the beginning. As our kids grow, we continue letting go in many ways. It’s useful to exercise those letting go skills when planning a wedding. There are so many things we can’t control. Recognizing that and letting go of control was key for me. It allowed me to worry less and enjoy more. The wedding was outside. Weather is one of the many things we have no control over. Letting go and focusing on the things we have agency over is useful. For example, we ordered a tent with attachable sides, in case it rained. We had control of the tent situation, but not the weather. Luckily, the wedding day was gorgeous. However, the newlyweds’ brunch on the following day was rainy, but the tent sides kept us cozy and dry.

“Letting go and focusing on the things we have agency over is useful.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Planning

A lot of thought and organizing went into the wedding weekend. As I mentioned, Cassie and Matthew did all of the event planning. Their Google spreadsheets were amazing! However, my husband, Steve, and I had our lists too. The key was not waiting until the last minute to do things. In the months leading up to the wedding weekend, we made good use of evenings and weekends to prepare the house, clean, edit, organize, and schedule. There’s nothing quite like having a party to motivate you to get things done. I created a master list with separate projects and tasks in each section. Planning and allocating enough time to complete things made it less stressful. It also enabled me to more fully enjoy the process. I also discovered a fun fact. My daughters and I are all list-makers who prefer using a combination of digital and handwritten lists to get things done.

Madison Must Photography

Being Present

Days before the wedding, Cassie, Matthew, and our oldest daughter, Allison, arrived. What an incredible feeling to have everyone home! We’ve had very few visitors during the pandemic. I don’t remember the last time our kids were home with us for five days. What a treat! I didn’t want to miss anything. There were times when the girls were off in a corner experimenting with hair and makeup, or Matthew and Steve were in the greenhouse setting up equipment for the ceremony. At those moments, I was an observer, sensing family helping family, hearing laughter, and feeling the warmth of our house full of loved ones. At other times, I was in a doing mode. On Cassie’s wedding day, she asked us to put away our phones. She wanted the wedding photographer to be the only one taking pictures so we could be fully present. How wise. What a gift that was! It made me realize how many being present opportunities there were.

“There were many being present opportunities.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

Leaning In

There were so many emotions- joy, happiness, excitement, and sadness too. It was an intense variety of feelings. I embraced them all. While I was overjoyed that the parents, one set of grandparents, siblings, and a few of the bride and groom’s friends were with us in person on the wedding day, the rest of our family and friends couldn’t be there because of pandemic restrictions.  For those who couldn't attend in person, they watched the ceremony live on Zoom. I won’t lie. I missed the physical presence of my brothers, sisters, parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, nephews, and friends. It felt so strange to celebrate a major milestone without them. I recognize that I’m not alone. This year, many people have experienced celebrations differently. With acceptance, I leaned into my conflicting emotions- feeling the joy of being together with the people that could attend and the sadness for those that couldn’t. 

Madison Must Photography

Reflecting

When we go through significant life events, it’s important to make time to reflect on our experiences. There were so many memorable moments and feelings that replay in my mind. I know more will continue to appear, but I thought I’d share several with you.

• Hugging our kids after being physically apart for so long.

• Hearing the sweet sounds of talking, giggling, and laughter fill our home.

• Spending time setting up, eating, and walking in the woods with our family and Matthew’s parents and three brothers the day before the wedding. 

• Experiencing the poignancy of painting Cassie’s finger and toenails the night before her wedding day and remembering how I used to paint her nails when she was little.

• Watching Allison dote over Cassie during the wedding weekend, as she helped with her hair and makeup, and anything she needed.

• Seeing my handsome husband all dressed-up as the Father of the Bride.

• Feeling grateful to meet Matthew’s grandparents and have them with us as they watched their first grandchild marry.

• Bursting into tears when moments before we walked Cassie down the aisle, I saw my mother, brother, and sister on Zoom waiting to watch the ceremony. I missed them so, yet felt their love and support.

• Feeling the swell of emotions as Steve and I walked Cassie down the aisle.

• Watching Matthew’s loving expression and tears as he saw Cassie in her wedding dress for the first time.

• During the ceremony, seeing Cassie and Matthew hold hands and stare into each other’s eyes as tears streamed down their faces.

• Feeling grateful for our new, wonderful son.

• Listening to the beautiful, emotional toast Allison gave to Cassie and Matthew on their wedding day.

• Seeing the joy between Steve and Cassie during their father/daughter dance.

• Watching how our beautiful Cassie seemed to float on air the entire day.

• Sitting down on the sofa with Steve after everyone left, feeling exhausted, elated, and amazed at how quickly the time passed.

• Feeling grateful for messages of love, good wishes, and support from our family and friends.

• Realizing that our little girl is all grown up and married.

• Feeling hope and possibilities for Cassie and Matthew for a life filled with love, connection, and family.

Madison Must Photography

We live in challenging times. Yet even in the darkest of days, there is hope. There is love. There are possibilities. These celebratory days with Cassie and Matthew’s marriage affirmed that light, love, hope, and possibilities are present. Have you recently experienced something in your life that has inspired possibilities for you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.