The other day, I took an early evening walk along the Hudson River with my friend. Towards the end of our walk, the sun began to set and what I saw was incredible. The coolness of the light blue sky and deep blue water slowly shifted to warmer tones. As the round ball of sun lowered towards the horizon, its glow cast orange shimmers of light on the landscape. The visual change was magnificent. We sat on the rocks to take in the view.

If I had kept walking without looking or being mindful, I would have missed this spectacular moment. You might wonder, how is it possible to miss such a thing? It is.

You can walk but not notice what surrounds you. You can rush through your day getting stuff done but miss mindful moments of presence, joy, or calm. You can eat a meal but not savor the flavors and textures of your food. You can have a conversation but not listen to what the other person is saying. You can live in a cluttered environment but ignore how its heaviness is impacting you.

There are many ways not to be mindful. So often, we live on autopilot. We move from thing to thing without questioning, noticing, pausing, or enjoying. What becomes possible when we bring more mindfulness into our lives? A walk in nature with a friend becomes an opportunity to engage in a wonderful conversation while appreciating the changing scenery. A mindful meal creates a chance to slow down enough to taste the delicious flavors.

“There are many ways NOT to be mindful.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Have you found yourself rushing through life? What would a life with more pauses and mindful moments look and feel like? How would that change your perspective and experience? What is one thing you can do now to add more mindfulness to your day? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

When you think of mindfulness, what are your thoughts? Do you think about the formal practice of mindfulness meditation? Are you conjuring up images of breathing slowly or being still? Do you think about mindfulness as being present and aware of something like slowly sipping a hot cup of tea or watching the fall leaves gracefully float to the ground? There are formal mindfulness meditation practices and informal ways to incorporate living mindfully.

For today, I’m going to focus on the mindfully living aspect. I recently discussed the joy stretch with one of my organizing clients. This ‘stretch’ extends the experience of joy-filled moments through mindful awareness. Most mindfulness definitions include present or presence. However, the joy stretch consists of the past, present, and future. You bring conscious awareness to positive thoughts about the future, delightful experiences in the present, and happy memories from the past.

The joy stretch can be used in many ways. This summer, we had a few mini-vacations. Before each one, I engaged in future-thinking about the fun things we would do and the places we would visit. During the vacations, I stayed present to enjoy what I was experiencing, seeing, exploring, and feeling. In this post-vacation time, I appreciate thinking about the happy times we had while away. I read my journal, look at photos, or talk about our travels with my husband, family, or friends. All of these things increase my joy in the present moment.

Without mindfulness, I would be going through the motions of life and not necessarily stopping to appreciate and capture my pleasurable experiences. Extend happiness beyond a particular time or event by activating the joy stretch.

“Activate the ‘joy stretch’ for a happier past, present, and future.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Use the joy stretch for all life experiences, including organizing. Let’s say you want to organize your clothing closet to prepare for the cooler seasons. Instead of leaning into a place of overwhelm or stress, envision what it will look and feel like when you’re done. Imagine what it will be like after you edit the clothing that no longer fits, you never wear, and are taking up time, space, and energy. Bask in those positive images of your future closet. Feel that joy, calm, satisfaction, and spaciousness.

As you organize your closet in the present, remind yourself that you ‘get to do this.’ It’s not a have-to or should-do but a get-to. Appreciate your ability to ask questions and make decisions. Will you decide to donate, recycle, or keep that pair of pants you bought on sale but never wear? Feel the joy in the moment of doing, improving, and progressing.

You’re on the other side now. You completed your closet organizing project. Only those clothes you love, fit, and are seasonally appropriate are accessible. There is space for your clothes to breathe and room for you to move around. You find yourself ‘visiting’ the closet a few extra times a day to admire your work and how it looks. The project is done, but the joy continues to be experienced way beyond completion.

Life isn’t always joy-filled or happy. There will be dark times and days. As a counterbalance, creating as much joy as possible is essential. Mindfully activate your joy stretch with positive thoughts about a future experience, happy moments in the present, and reflections on joy-filled times in the past.

Have you used mindful awareness to do a joy stretch? What joyful experiences are you looking forward, currently experiencing, or recently happened? What role has mindfulness played? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Having an array of emotions is part of being human. There are no good or bad ones. However, at times, our strong emotions can make clear thoughts challenging. In fact, some emotions like anxiety, sadness, or fear can cause procrastination or completely zap our motivation.

When the amygdala, the primitive, emotional region of the brain, becomes the boss, it creates a cycle that activates the sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight.) The good news is many self-help strategies are available to help switch your internal gears from fight or flight to the rest and digest, parasympathetic nervous system mode.

When calmer, you can more readily access the pre-frontal cortex, a part of the brain that helps with decision-making, organization, attention, planning, emotional regulation, and impulse control. In this more relaxed state, you can reset and access the motivation to move forward.

Recently, I attended a meeting with fellow Nest Advisor, Monica Moore, a health and fertility coach. She led a workshop on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT.) The four-step process is helpful when making behavioral changes. ACT encourages working towards a value rather than avoiding something. In other words, focus your energy on something positive you want to be or do instead of on something negative you wish to avoid.

The ACT process:

1. Identify a value. Who or what do I want to be?

2. Identify feelings. What “yucky” feelings get in the way?

3. Identify relief valves. When you feel these things, what behaviors occur?

4. Create a nourishment menu. What behaviors will feel helpful, sustainable, and give perspective when experiencing the “yucky” feelings?

Your nourishment menu is where self-help strategies thrive. For example, when feeling anxious, you might engage in negative self-talk, binge-watching, or eating sugar-heavy snacks. What if you acknowledged and noticed those feelings when you felt anxious and instead, engaged in more helpful behaviors from the nourishment menu? Below are some suggestions. I’d love to know which of these or other ones work best for you.

20 Self-Help Strategies - Nourishment Menu

• Journal

• Meditate

• Take a walk

• Change your setting

• Organize or clean

• Create boundaries

• Breathe slowly

• Get a massage

• Hug a loved one for at least 20 seconds

• Run or exercise

• Watch leaves flutter

• Light a scented candle

• Use humor

• Rest

• Read

• Pet your dog or cat

• Listen to or play music

• Take a shower or bath

• Help someone else

• Talk with a friend, family member, or professional

I had a recent anxiety-inducing experience when I inadvertently deleted the most current 45 days of emails from my inbox. After long calls with tech support at Apple and Carbonite, it became clear that the emails might be retrieved, but not without many more hours spent with tech support and possibly worse complications.

A tech hiccup is never convenient. My plans to accomplish a lot that day were derailed because of the anxiety inability to focus. At a point, I decided to let it go and not retrieve the emails. However, I was still anxious and not functioning well. My emotions were in high gear, and my brain was foggy. So what did I do?

“Your ‘nourishment menu’ is where self-help strategies thrive.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

I grabbed my journal and wrote. As the inky pen glided along the smooth paper, my heart beat rapidly, and my stomach was in knots. I wrote about the ‘gone’ emails, my anxious feelings, the power they had to deactivate my motivation, the shift in my emotional state of feeling calmer as I wrote, and the choice to let this go and move on. I noticed my environment (birds chirping, trees swaying), took several deep breaths, and shifted gears to write about positive memories from the mini vacation we just had.

After journaling, I met a dear friend for a walk along the river. We talked, laughed, and I shared the email saga with her. Not knowing about the nourishment menu at the time, I realized after how I had used several of these strategies to calm my anxiety, let go, and reset.

What self-help strategies work for you when your strong emotions take over? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

The newest installment (v36) of the “What’s Interesting?” feature has my latest finds which inform, educate, and relate to organizing and life balance. These unique, inspiring, enlisting help discoveries reflect this month’s blog theme. 

You are a generous, communicative, and engaged group. I am deeply grateful for your ongoing presence, positive energy, and contributions to this community. I look forward to your participation and additions to the collection I’ve sourced.

What do you find interesting?

What’s Interesting? – 5 Best Enlisting Help Discoveries

1. Interesting Read – Focus Help

I’ve often said the quality of your questions profoundly influences the quality of your decisions. In The Focus Project – The Not So Simple Art of Doing Less, author and keynote speaker Erik Qualman has cultivated the art of asking great questions. Qualman asked people what led to their sustained success and what was their greatest challenge. The answers, which came from CEOs, teachers, parents, entrepreneurs, and others, responded similarly. Their key to success was “focus.” Their greatest challenge was “staying focused.”

These responses resonated with Qualman so intensely that he created The Focus Project, a yearlong journey to help himself and others “to focus on what matters most.” He selected twelve areas to explore (one per month), including Growth, Health, Relationships, Gratitude, and Mindfulness. There’s even a chapter on Time/Energy Management, which includes ideas about organizing, multitasking, and scheduling. You will love this book if you need help focusing on WIN (What’s Important Now) in an “increasingly unfocused world.” 

2. Interesting Trend – Home Office Help

While many have returned to the office, others still work from home. If you’re working from home, you might have a dedicated room as your home office. However, many do not because there is no space. Instead, they continually shift their workspace from dining room tables to couches or kitchen counters. For those who desire a dedicated office area but are tight on space, help is here.

Have you heard of the cloffice? Yes, you read it correctly. The cloffice is a closet turned into an office. If you don't have a closet that can be repurposed, consider using an alcove instead. Elements to consider incorporating are a work surface, storage space, electricity, and good lighting.

“There are times when it’s beneficial to reach out for help.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

3. Interesting Product  – Mood Help

There are numerous strategies to shift your mood. This can be an internal job, such as working through your negative self-talk. But external ways also help improve your mood, like being in nature or creating a positive environment. One huge mood booster is introducing pleasing scents. I love to burn candles and always look for ones that smell great.

I recently discovered Anecdote Candles, which have humorous descriptions with marvelous aromas. One of my favorites is Wanderlust, with mandarin and berry notes described as “hopeful escapes and aimless destinations.” Another fun one is Coffee Break, which “smells like procrastination and inspiration.”

4. Interesting Fact – E-Clutter Help

Do you need help with e-clutter? Is your inbox inundated with spam and unread emails? The Good Planet reported in 2019 that 293.6 billion emails were sent and received every 24 hours, which included approximately 107 billion spam emails. They propose that if every person deleted 10 emails, we could collectively save 1,725,000 gigabytes of storage space and about 55.2 million kilowatts of power. They suggest unsubscribing from emails you no longer need, deleting spam emails, and deleting emails after reading them. Declutter, which will help your inbox and the planet.

5. Interesting Thought – Unstuck Help

Have you ever felt stuck? What was the circumstance? Were you unsure of your next step? Did you need more information to continue your organizing project? Were you overwhelmed? Sometimes we can wiggle our way out of feeling stuck on our own to get things flowing by walking, writing, or sleeping. But there are also times when it’s beneficial to reach out for help. Engage in a conversation with a friend or colleague. Or hire a professional organizer like me to help work through the challenge and incorporate accountability.

What are your interesting enlisting help discoveries? Which of these resonate with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.