Posts in Too Hard to Let Go
What Letting Go Can Do for You: Unexpected Benefits Found

Letting go is usually intentional. At least, it seems purposeful most of the time for my clients and me. Holding on can create stress, conflict, overwhelm, disappointment, confusion, or anxiety. The same can be said for the process of letting go. Thinking about saying ‘good-bye’ to things or situations can be its own type of challenge. However, when we finally let go, it allows for open space, growth, and relief.

I often consider letting go like a muscle that needs exercise and practice. The more you use the letting go muscle, the easier the process becomes. Decision-making goes more smoothly, too, as you set boundaries or rules around what stays or goes.

What happens when you accidentally let go? You might wonder how someone can unintentionally let go like one giant, whoops. I experienced this last week.

You are probably familiar with the term “inbox zero.” Some set a goal to have no (as in nothing, none, nil, zilch) emails in their inbox. Instead of keeping all emails visible, you route incoming emails to specific, organized locations to achieve a clear inbox. They can move to the trash, action, or archive folders along with a cue to follow through on a trusted task list.

Let’s return to my saga. With full disclosure, I can’t tell you exactly how it happened, but I remember that multitasking was involved. I couldn’t repeat the mistake if I tried. But the result was that I accidentally deleted all the emails in my inbox and couldn’t get them back. There were about 100, and I had responded to most but not all of them.

My first reaction was panic. Then I tried to undo the error. In my frenzy, I think I made things worse. So, I stopped. I took several deep breaths and asked myself, “Linda, now what?” There were several options, including getting on the phone with tech support to see if they could help retrieve the deletions. I lacked time, confidence, and patience for that option. I was also in the middle of several deadlines and needed to focus on those instead of my big mistake. I knew how quickly my day could have deteriorated with negative self-talk, paralysis, and frustration. Those weren’t good options.

Letting go allows for open space, growth, and relief.
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

I felt calmer when I recognized that some emails could be retrieved through the “sent” email box if needed. In addition, if I missed something important, the sender would hopefully resend it to me. If you sent me an email and I never responded, please resend it. Thank you.

Letting Go: Unexpected Benefits

It’s been over a week without those deleted emails, and it’s been OK as of today. I let go of a lot and discovered some things along the way.

  • There is no perfect.

  • I’m human and make mistakes.

  • Life goes on even without a full inbox.

  • The most important things were handled.

  • I recognized growth in how I kept my initial panic to a minimum.

  • Resilience was visible as I quickly recovered from ‘the incident.’

  • Multitasking can be dangerous.

  • Appreciate the improved focus with fewer emails visible.

  • Be grateful for the empty inbox, even if unintentional.

  • Acknowledge the available time doing fun things like planting my small vegetable garden instead of stressing over retrieving emails.

  • Find the humor in the situation.

  • Remember the big picture.

In the end, letting go, while unexpected, was valuable. I’ve recovered from the mishap, appreciate a less full inbox, and feel lighter and less encumbered.

Have you ever let go accidentally? If so, what happened? What did you discover? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 
When Your Big Plate Is Quickly Overflowing, Can You Let Go of One Thing?

Overflowing. Overwhelming. Is letting go on your radar? How many things are you working on right now? How many hats are you wearing? Are you juggling family, work, and personal time? Are you managing projects, shuttling kids, caring for elders, or experiencing a life transition? Does your plate feel so full that your head is spinning? Is this a constant or temporary state for you?

Have you considered the power and relief of letting go? OK. I know you can’t let go of all your responsibilities and commitments. However…

  • Is there simply one thing you can let go of, reschedule, or delegate?

  • Is there one thing you can rethink, change perspective, or shift?

  • If you did, how would that help?

  • Would it reduce stress?

  • Would you feel more relaxed?

  • Would you be less overwhelmed?

Is there simply ‘one thing’ you can let go of, reschedule, or delegate?
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

I extended myself the ‘one-thing-let-go’ gift. Instead of writing a longer post this week, I went short like me. I let go of the expectation to write more extensively so I could alleviate some pressure and focus on preparing, hosting, and enjoying our family and friends for Passover.

What one thing can you let go of? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 
How to Joyfully Let Go of More When You Feel You Might Need It Someday

Do you find it challenging to let go of things? If so, you’re not alone. One of the phrases I frequently hear from my clients during the decision-making process is, “I might need it someday.”  Have you heard or said that?

Recently, one of my clients shared a passage from the CliftonStrengths assessment she took, which described her top strength, Input. She said the narrative deeply resonated with her. Since I thought this would interest you, I asked her permission to share it.

 

Input – CliftonStrengths 34

“You are inquisitive. You collect things. You might collect information-words, facts, books, and quotations- or tangible objects such as butterflies, baseball cards, porcelain dolls, or sepia photographs. Whatever you collect, you collect it because it interests you. And yours is the kind of mind that finds so many things interesting. The world is exciting precisely because of its infinite variety and complexity. If you read a great deal, it is not necessarily to refine your theories but, rather, to add more information to your archives. If you like to travel, it is because each new location offers novel artifacts and facts. These can be acquired and then stored away. Why are they worth storing? At the time of storing it is often hard to say exactly when or why you might need them, but who knows when they might become useful? With all those possible uses in mind, you really don’t feel comfortable throwing anything away. So you keep acquiring and compiling and filing stuff away. It’s interesting. It keeps your mind fresh. And perhaps one day some of it will prove valuable.”

 

The idea, “I might need it someday,” can be answered with more questions. Tease out the value of that “thing” you are holding onto. I don’t advocate letting go for the sake of that alone. Releasing comes from a place of readiness and purpose. What might have been of value to you in the past may no longer feel as useful or essential.

Releasing comes from a place of readiness and purpose.
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

What is your goal? Is it to live with less, reduce clutter, or downsize a lifetime of belongings? Is it to release the weight of the past to make space for how you want your life to be now? Holding onto things for “someday” may feel less relevant for certain things. There are no hard and fast rules here. It’s more of an opportunity to examine and use your curiosity to ask great questions. Your decision will become clear.

Click here for 21 letting go questions. Which one speaks to you? What helps you let go? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 
How to Successfully Let Go Now Even If It's Only for Today

Do you ever feel compelled to complete a project, start one, or simply get random tasks done instead of not doing them? Honestly, most days, that’s me. My inner driver strives to accomplish and move things forward. I’m not perpetually focused on my list, but I am always aware of items that need my attention. I enjoy the satisfaction of getting things done. Today was no different. Does this sound familiar?

Sometimes I recognize what I really need to do is let go. I had my list of what I wanted to accomplish today, and writing this post was at the top. However, after meditating, journaling, and eating a leisurely breakfast, I took a walk with my husband. The beautiful spring day called out to me. “Linda, it’s too nice to be inside. Come out now!” With an offer like that, how could I resist?

Guess what? I couldn’t refuse, so I leaned in, let go, and went for a long walk before sitting down to write. It was time to savor simple pleasures.

The air was warm with a slight breeze. We wandered over the Croton dam and meandered through the woods. We spotted yellow and purple flowers, heard bamboo stalks rustling, smelled the sweetness of spring, heard birds chirping, and listened to the sounds of flowing water. It felt so good to be outside on this amazing day. I let go of and paused my to-do list to enjoy nature and time with Steve.

Sometimes I recognize what I really need to do is let go.
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

After our walk, we ate lunch outside in the backyard. The warm sun made us a tad bit sleepy. So uncharacteristically, we took a short nap in our chairs as the birds sang and the sun lulled us to sleep. When we woke, I was ready to activate.

Here I am now, writing this shorter post. Soon I will go outside again to partake in this spectacular day. 

What can you let go of now, even if it’s only for today? Do you need a break from your list? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.