Letting go is a main focus of my work with clients. They feel overwhelmed and burdened by the stuff in their lives and want my help to let go, organize, and live with more ease. The “stuff” appears as rooms overflowing with physical belongings, calendars scheduled with no breathing space, or minds filled with a barrage of ideas and thoughts.

Recently, I viewed letting go from another perspective. I had the great joy of meeting with my Westchester NAPO Neighborhood Group organizing colleagues for a field trip and tour of a local auction house, The Benefit Shop in Mt Kisco, NY. This is where the things that have been let go of land on their way to their new home.

Our group was graciously welcomed by Pam Stone, Founder and President of The Benefit Shop Foundation Inc. After working on Wall Street for over two decades, Pam changed careers to pursue her passion project. She set up The Benefit Shop, a charitable 501(c)3 non-profit. Proceeds from sales (100% of the profit) go to over 40 charities, which directly help local community organizations. As Pam said, “I really wanted the beneficiary to be my community, for the people who live and work here.”

How Letting Go is Facilitated

The Benefit Shop is what Pam refers to as “one-stop shopping.” They accept items for:

• Donation

• Consignment or

• Estate Buyout

You can bring your things to their 16,000-square-foot gallery and office space. Or, depending on your location, they will bring a truck and a team to you, pack up what you’re letting go of, and transport it to their facility to prepare for auction and sale. With estate buyouts, they will take 90% of a house’s contents.

Pam suggests tagging your items using a colored sticker system.

• Red = Keep

• Green = Go

• Yellow = Think on it.

If you’re not ready to let go of everything at once, they recommend that clients “think on it," which allows them to release things in stages.

They also encourage clients to contribute to the catalogue entries by sharing stories and histories about their objects. Capturing the object’s story enhances its saleability and helps the client feel better about letting go.

“Let go, organize, and live with more ease.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

How Do the Auctions Work?

The Benefit Shop hosts weekly online auctions. They sell around 3,000 items each month to a global audience.

• All bids, with a few exceptions, start at $1.

• Items sold at auction are reconciled within 45 days.

• Clients receive 65%, and The Benefit Shop keeps 35%.

• Consignors receive a tax-deductible receipt along with their settlement checks.

• Unsold items can be donated or retrieved by the consignor.

• The Benefit Shop doesn’t provide shipping for purchased auction items. You can either pick them up at their office or arrange for shipping. They offer resources for several vetted and recommended shipping vendors.

Letting Go Considerations

Are you curious which items are the easiest or most difficult to sell at auction?

Pam said that jewelry (fine and costume) and handbags consistently sell well.

Large china cabinets and dark wood furniture are not good sellers. While mid-century furniture is popular, only high-end, name-recognizable brands such as Eames, Knoll, or Saarinen sell well at auction. The Danish teak mid-century modern style of furniture doesn’t do well.

More Fun Facts About The Benefit Shop

Organization

I was impressed by the organization at The Benefit Shop.

• Items for sale are logged in, tagged, and grouped by category.

• They get coded and routed for the auctions in which they will be included.

• Each category has separate sections at the facility, such as housewares, textiles, clothing, purses, jewelry, art, and furniture.

• There is a photography area for taking quality photos of every piece.

The Shop Mascot

When you enter the space, a giant taxidermy elk is one of the first things you see. When I asked about it, Pam said it wasn’t for sale because it has become their gallery mascot.

Pop-Ups and Cash & Carry

• Aside from the online auctions, they also hold occasional onsite pop-up events at their place.

• In the gallery, there is also a $1 only group of items to purchase as ‘cash and carry’. The items are sold and replenished regularly.

Why Let Go?

It was fun visiting a place representing so many decisions to let go of stuff. The objects received were treated with care and respect. It felt good knowing these things would go to a good home, stay out of the landfill, and the proceeds would help those in need.

The Benefit Shop Foundation

The Westchester NAPO Neighborhood Group visits Pam Stone, Founder and President of The Benefit Shop Foundation in Mt. Kisco, NY

Where Do Your Things Go?

When you let go of things, where do they go? Do you have favorite charities? Have you used auction houses? What helps you release things that have overstayed their welcome?  I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, editing, or letting go? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – Local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Letting go is possible, especially with support.

What is the value of letting go? In many circumstances, your willingness to let go can reduce frustration and enhance your daily life. Let go when you are:

• Stuck

• Overwhelmed

• Frustrated

• Burdened by the past

• Weighed down by physical stuff

• Distressed by non-supportive processes, relationships, and environments

• Determined to be present or move forward

I curated a small collection of my favorite letting-go quotes from Yung Pueblo, Chuck Palahniuk, Todd Henry, and Hans Hoffman. Each idea highlights a unique aspect of releasing.

When you allow yourself to let go, you experience less stress, more flow, and better alignment with your values. The past won’t hold you back. You’ll be more grounded in the present and open to possibilities that you couldn’t see before.

FIVE FAVORITE LETTING GO QUOTES

1. Let Go of the Past

Letting go is a process. Release things that no longer serve a purpose in your life. This will create more mindful and present-centered living.

“When you put yourself through the process of letting go, you gain greater access to the here and now.”

— Yung Pueblo

 2. Let Go of the Stuff

When the volume of possessions becomes overwhelming and burdensome, they take up your valuable time and energy. This is a cue to edit. Keep what’s most important. Release what you can. You’ll feel lighter and less encumbered.

“The things you own end up owning you.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

3. Let Go of the Complex

Life is complicated. However, you don’t have to make things more involved than necessary. Consider what you can release to simplify your schedule, processes, or thought patterns.

“Is there any place where you are making things more complex than they need to be?”

— Todd Henry

4. Let Go of the Only Once Idea

Letting go is like a muscle. It needs to be exercised to develop and experience results. Releasing is not a one-and-done occurrence. It requires time, attention, and practice to experience positive results.

“Letting go is not a one-time event; it is a habit that requires consistent repetition to become strong.”

— Yung Pueblo

 5. Let Go of the Unnecessary

Thinking or thriving is impossible when you have too much stuff, crammed schedules, or unhelpful thoughts. The excess gets in the way and makes it challenging to discover what’s most important. Letting go of the unessential will create space for what you truly value.

“The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.”

— Hans Hofmann

Is Letting Go Easy or Challenging?

You might find letting go easy for some areas of your life and more challenging in others. What has been a successful letting-go experience? What has been difficult? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, planning, or letting go? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – Local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Letting go is possible, especially with support.

Do you create obstacles for yourself before embarking on the next step? These might include a list of self-imposed pre-requirements before you can take the next step or tackle a new project.

Perhaps your goal is spring cleaning and organizing. While that’s a great goal, instead of beginning the process, you set parameters that make it nearly impossible to take the next step.

For instance, you prefer tackling this project in big time blocks rather than shorter, focused sessions. However, your life commitments and energy levels aren’t conducive to organizing three, four, or five hours at a time.

As a result, what happens? Things stagnate because you don’t have large swaths of time to move your project forward. You frontloaded the project with an obstacle that closed your mind to alternative solutions and experimentation.

Does this sound familiar?

What Are Toxic Preconditions?

A few weeks ago, I discovered the term “toxic preconditions” in Oliver Burkeman’s newsletter, The Imperfectionist. He learned this concept from James Horton, a social scientist who questioned why people who want to write more don’t.

Horton observed that some aspiring writers had “misguided beliefs” that might have seemed helpful but undermined their confidence, causing them to write less or not at all.

Burkeman says that what’s behind toxic preconditions is “the strong desire we have for some kind of guarantee – before we embark on a new activity, or even allow ourselves to relax into life – that it’ll all unfold safely and securely, that we’ll retain the feeling of being in control.”

He advocates how freeing it is to let go of that need for a “guarantee.” Burkeman says, “Getting past toxic preconditions is less a matter of being willing to step into the unknown than of realizing that you’re already in the unknown.” He goes on to say, “You never had control; all you had was anxiety.”

“Do you set parameters that make it nearly impossible to take the next step?”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Letting Go of Toxic Preconditions

There are three aspects for releasing toxic preconditions:

1. Observe – Notice when you are putting up obstacles to the extent that you can’t move toward your goal or next step.

2. Accept – Acknowledge there are no guarantees. Instead, move forward with curiosity, openness, and a willingness to experiment.

3. Release – Let go of any preconditions that are toxic. Be willing to take that next step without first doing a, b, c, d, or e. Go forth without all the i’s dotted and t’s crossed.

I want to re-establish my daily walking habit. In the past months, I put up obstacles based on the weather, which I can’t control. I won't walk every day if I’m only willing to walk when it’s warm and sunny. I’ve been telling myself, “It’s too cold.” Or, “It’s too dreary.” If, instead, I adjust the parameters, like the length of a walk, wearing more layers, or walking inside instead of out, I’ll be more likely to reach my daily walking goal.

“Getting past toxic preconditions is less a matter of being willing to step into the unknown than of realizing that you’re already in the unknown.”

— Oliver Burkeman

What’s On the Other Side of Toxicity?

Let’s face it. Life has challenges. However, how often do you create obstacles and make things more complicated than necessary? If you tend to hinder your progress, I encourage you to explore new options. Release those toxic preconditions that aren’t serving you. Experience more movement, flow, and success.

Have you encountered toxic preconditions in others or yourself? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, editing, planning, or working on that next step? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Figuring out next is possible, especially with support.

Yes. It’s still officially winter, and our recent run of several warm days has reverted to colder temperatures. Despite the fluctuating thermometer, I notice hopeful signs of spring as nature begins its blooming ritual. Frequent sightings of green plants push through the ground to greet the blue sun-filled sky. They don’t hesitate. After being dormant for months, rejoining life with gusto is their next step.

Nature’s confident growth got me thinking about things that prevent us from moving forward.

• How about the mile-long to-do list?

• Is yours dormant and paralyzing?

• Or are you actively working on it?

• Is your list meaningful and necessary?

• Or is it filled with tasks that aren’t essential and you don’t care about?

• Is your list so daunting that it brings up negative feelings, regret, and disappointment?

• Or instead does it inspire you to act?

If you are struggling to determine your next step, here is a novel idea: Lose your ‘negative list.’ Crumple it up, let it go, and say buh-bye! That might sound radical, and perhaps it is. But can you imagine doing it anyway? And if you did, what might happen?

What’s On Your Negative List

Things holding you back can be concrete or emotional. They might include things like:

• Thought loops with messages such as “I can’t” or “I’m not good enough”

• Projects that would be nice to do, but realistically you’ll never get to

• Thank you notes that are years overdue

• Plans you wanted to make with friends or family, but never did

• Piles of magazines with articles to clip and file

• Stuff inherited from other people’s lives to sort and edit

• Papers and objects representing previous careers or life stages to curate and edit

Without realizing it, I had a negative list. It included feeling bad about not yet:

• Finishing my 2024 review or 2025 plan (and it’s already March!)

• Selecting my 2025 word or motto

• Choosing the topic and scheduling my next workshop

• Creating a video about virtual organizing

Make Your Next Step Easier

It may sound too simplistic to lose or release your negative list. However, recognizing how it might be holding you back makes it worth trying.

Maybe you’ll decide you still want to attend to some things on that list. And if so, perhaps a reframe of how you think about that ‘thing’ will make the difference. For example, instead of the projects you’ll never get to demotivating you, celebrate the ones you have accomplished. Review the remaining ones to decide if one is worth pursuing. If so, think about it as a project you get to, not have to do. Release the rest.

As Oliver Burkeman says in Four Thousand Weeks, our time is limited. “The average human lifespan is absurdly, terrifyingly, insultingly short.” We will never get everything done or be able to pursue every possibility that exists. Burkeman says, “we’ve been granted the mental capacities to make almost infinitely ambitious plans, yet practically no time at all to put them into action.”

Recognizing these limitations can be freeing. Don’t try to do everything. Instead, let go of what is holding you back and pursue what’s most meaningful and necessary.

Selecting next will become easier. Guilt will be gone. Action and intention will rule the day. What comes next will be joyfully embraced once you are unencumbered by the lingering tasks you’ve chosen to release from your list.

“The average human lifespan is absurdly, terrifyingly, insultingly short.”

— Oliver Burkeman

What’s Next?

I might forgo choosing a new word and motto this year and even skip a deeper review of 2024. Just considering that option makes me feel lighter and more energetic. After all, I imposed these things on myself, and I can just as quickly release them from my list.

My next steps will prioritize energizing and nourishing actions, projects, and ideas. What will be next for you? What can you release that is holding you back? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

How Can I Help?

Do you want support organizing, planning, or figuring out your next step? I’d love to help! Virtual organizing is an extraordinary path forward – local feel with a global reach.

Please schedule a Discovery Call, email me at linda@ohsorganized.com, or call 914-271-5673. Change is possible, especially with support.