There is a precarious nature to balance. One minute you’re standing solidly on the ground, and the next, you’re on that slippery slope about to go down the ravine. Our footing can be compromised in a moment. As I stopped to take this photo at the edge of the wooded path looking down on the Croton River, I slipped on the wet rocks and leaves. Feeling like I was in slow motion, I lost my balance, falling onto my back and looking up at the canopy of leafless trees. My heart pounded as I gently stood up unharmed but realized it could have been so much worse.
Isn’t our life balance a bit like that too? We’re going along just fine, feet firmly planted on the ground, and then there is a slight shift. Sometimes it’s imperceptible. Maybe we’re no longer getting enough sleep, overeating sugar, not maintaining our organizing systems, or cramming too much into our schedule. Before you know it, our balance is off. We’re cranky, less energetic, overwhelmed, and surrounded by chaos. There we are on our backs wondering what the heck happened.
I was curious about the ways my colleagues navigate balance in their lives. So, I reached out to this generous group – Janet Barclay, Jonda Beattie, Julie Bestry, Ellen Delap, Ronni Eisenberg, Christine Li, Diane Quintana, Sabrina Quairoli, Janet Schiesl, Yota Schneider, Geralin Thomas, and Seana Turner. I asked them to respond to and elaborate on this prompt-
If I had less (________), I’d feel more balanced.
Their responses describe internal and external shift strategies which are personal, insightful, and inspiring. My deepest gratitude goes out to them for sharing their hearts and wisdom with us.
Balance By Creating Internal Shifts
“If I had less of and didn’t succumb to old and familiar life triggers that, in an instant, throw me off, I would have more balance in my life. It’s those nagging triggers, like not being heard, that was learned so many years ago. It’s a sense of sensitivity whereby thoughts and emotions are redirected. They seem right there, always dangling in full view, so it’s not difficult to roll them in and react to them. Triggers can play a painful part in who we are. However, when I see one coming, and recognize it for what it is, and refuse to knuckle under, I feel so incredibly balanced and find strength in what is truly a wonderful place to be.”
Ronni Eisenberg – Professional Organizer, Teacher, Author, Blogger
“If I had less uncertainty, I’d feel more balanced. When I don’t know what is going to happen, I tend to feel out of control and often respond in ways that are not always healthy. Of course, I cannot eliminate uncertainty entirely. However, I can ‘control the controllables,’ such as planning my meals, establishing and following both a calendar and a to-do list, prepping all I need for the next day before I go to bed, etc. I’m also quick to seek help when I don’t know how to proceed.”
Seana Turner – Professional Organizer, Productivity Coach, Blogger
“If I had less time in my own head, I¹d feel more balanced. As a sentimental person, I spent a lot of time reminiscing about the past; as a solutions-oriented professional organizer, I am inclined to jump into thinking about end-results and what I want to have achieved when I look back on my life. I'm great at being mindful when I'm with clients but on my own? Not so much. While I am very lucky to have a more-than-equitable work-life balance, I suspect I'd have better overall life balance if I spent more time doing rather than reminiscing or planning what I should, should, should do in the future.”
Julie Bestry, CPO® - Certified Professional Organizer, Author
“If I had less need for control, I’d feel more balanced. I’m a firstborn, mostly type-A person. The desire to have everything work out right (read ‘the way I think it should’) keeps me spinning way too much of the time. Allowing plans and projects to go off my plan and just relax more and be in the moment would lead to more peace and balance in my life. I’m working on it.”
Jonda Beattie, M.Ed. – Organizer, Author, Presenter, Blogger
“If I had less small business industry emails, I’d feel more balanced. Those emails share what other people are doing and how they are succeeding. If this weren’t in my life, I would be less likely to compare myself to others.”
Sabrina M. Quairoli – Professional Organizer, Bookkeeper, Marketer
“Less business as usual; more willingness to pay attention to how I feel in the moment. Making myself a priority has always been difficult. That is why spending quiet time alone, meditating, reading, being outside in nature, even for a short walk, helps me recalibrate and feel grounded. After that, it’s up to me to trust what I know, look at what causes me to feel out of balance, and make adjustments. Along the way, I may falter, but every day is a new beginning and another opportunity to do better by myself.”
Yota Schneider – Life Coach, Retreat Facilitator, Blogger
Balance By Making External Shifts
“If I had fewer plates in the air, I'd feel more balanced. I am in the middle of a 3-day conference at the moment, and one of the takeaways that I have gotten is that one of my most important needs is ACCOMPLISHMENT. I had never put a word to it before, so I felt that this was a useful thing for me to keep in mind. That is also why my response is ‘plates in the air,’ as this new realization has shown me that in the pursuit of accomplishment, I often am involved in more activities and pursuits than is actually good for me. And I do love SIMPLICITY too, so I will be working on trimming my task list down a bit in 2022.”
Christine Li, Ph.D. – Procrastination Coach, Clinical Psychologist, Podcast Host of the Make Time for Success podcast
“If I had fewer virtual meetings, I’d feel more balanced. The pandemic has changed how we work. It’s so easy to jump on a virtual call. But you’ll waste time if your input is not necessary for that meeting. Keep your valued time guarded by checking the call agenda. See if the topics being discussed are relevant to you and ask to be dropped from the meeting (join late or leave early) if not. This will give you more time to get important work done. If you are the meeting leader, keep to the agenda to save everyone some time and find more balance.”
Janet Schiesl, CPO® – Professional Organizer
“If I had less cake, I’d have a more balanced diet. Cake just happens to be one of my very favorite foods! I find it irresistible. I love the way cakes smell, feel, look, and taste. ‘Frosting, icing, or glazed’ you ask… I’ll answer: ‘Yes please!’ Sheet cakes. Bundt cakes. Cake pops. Tiered cakes. Layered cakes. Cupcakes. Cakes for birthdays, holidays, after school snacks, brunches, dinner parties, or afternoon tea. Flavor, size, shape matter not to me! Let ME eat cake!”
Geralin Thomas – Career Coach for Professional Organizers
“If I had less email to deal with, I’d feel more balanced. I've eliminated quite a bit by shutting down an account I no longer use and putting a stop to a lot of unwanted messages. But no matter how many lists I unsubscribe from, every time I buy something, I get added to another one.”
Janet Barclay, Certified Care Plans Specialist – Website Caregiver & Designer
“If I had less of a need to be a helper, I’d feel more balanced. Often as an Enneagram 2, I am motivated and find joy in being a helper who is generous in giving time to support our Kingwood, Texas community. Being a helper is a good thing in that I am connected to others and support those in need. It does keep me busier than I might like. I have strong ties to philanthropies and deep roots in my community. In 2022 I am limiting my commitment to local philanthropies to step back and be more in balance.”
Ellen R. Delap, CPO® - Certified Professional Organizer
“If I had less on my list of things to do, I’d feel more balanced. I have been working hard each day to accomplish everything for each of my businesses. I realize this is too much as I have been ignoring other aspects of my life. I always advise my clients to be realistic and to allow white space (unscheduled time) every day. I will be following my own advice in 2022. The past few days, I have been playing with my schedule to figure out how I can accomplish the things that are important to my business and allow me to have time for the things I have ignored. It all boils down to setting firm boundaries and remembering that ‘No’ is an answer.”
Diane N. Quintana, Master Trainer, CPO-CD®, CPO® – Professional Organizer, ADHD Specialist, Hoarding Specialist, Author
Finding balance, even when you’re feeling overwhelmed, is possible. With the creative ideas that my colleagues shared, you now have some new strategies to experiment with. Whether you choose to work on an internal or external shift, balance is possible for you. For me, when I’m off-balance, I ask the question, “What do you need right now, Linda?” That might be getting to sleep early, calling a friend, or getting some fresh air. These give me the reset I need to think more clearly and identify a tiny tweak or change I can make.
Which ideas resonate with you? If you had less (_______) in your life, would you feel more balanced? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Come join the conversation!