Posts tagged self-talk
7 Achievable Ways to Quickly Improve Your Work-Life Balance

We’re in the midst of the holiday season. Do you feel like a juggler in a circus? Between planning or attending gatherings, keeping your family fed, helping your kids or aging parents, and completing your work deadlines, your time is in high demand. Add to that, preparing for visitors coming and going, selecting and wrapping gifts, and making time for some self-care (yes, self-care…I’m talking to you) it’s a lot. Seriously. How many balls are you juggling at once? How do you navigate the many roles and responsibilities you have? There is a delicate nature to finding a doable work-life balance. Many of you will probably agree that the ‘right’ balance is a constantly moving target.

When my balance is off, I look carefully at my commitments and evaluate what change is needed. Have I said “yes” too often? Have I said “yes” to things that are nourishing and energizing? One of the best decisions and yeses I made a year ago was to Marcy Stoudt, CEO of Revel Coach and Founder of The Executive Mom Nest. This visionary Executive Coach and mother of three launched The Executive Mom Nest, or The Nest, as we affectionately call it. Marcy created a team of vetted Advisors from diverse yet complementary industries, including marketing, finance, design, wellness, life and career coaching, travel, and organization. The team supports, coaches, and mentors moms navigating career, family, and self. I’m thrilled that Marcy invited me to join her team as the Professional Organizer Advisor.

For a better understanding of work-life balance, I immediately thought about these insightful Nest Advisors and their collective wisdom. We meet regularly, and I always learn so much from them. I reached out to several colleagues, Marcy Stoudt, Neela Asaadi, Lucy Carlisle, Lana Kitcher, Petra Krebbs, Alison Nissen, and Becky Roth. I asked them- What is one strategy you use to restore your work-life balance?

Their responses are philosophical, practical, personal, and inspiring. My deepest gratitude goes out to them for sharing their hearts, experience, and honesty with us.



What is one strategy you use to restore your work-life balance?

1. Balance through Self-Care

"One constant that every single human being has is time, and we have the same amount of it. What we choose to do with it is our choice. The secret to any success story is moderation and living in harmony with yourself. If something doesn't go as planned, learn from it, don't judge it. If you indulge, enjoy it, and get back on track later! If you overworked yourself, give yourself a well-deserved rest. 

Strive to keep yourself grounded through fulfilling practices and rituals that fuel your soul. Morning rituals are personally my favorite way to set myself up for success, in addition to a delicious night's sleep to restore. Spend time investing in yourself. After all, it is the greatest gift you could give so you can show up as the best version of yourself for everyone around you."

Neela Asaadi Lifestyle Designer, Holistic Health Coach, Creative & Brand Director

 

 

2. Balance through Less Negative Self-Talk

“I get control of my negative self-talk. I'm a busy working mom. I'm proud of what I do. But, when I'm feeling overwhelmed, it's rarely because I am doing too much. It is almost always due to my mental chatter obsessing over my lack of time. I lose motivation, focus, and clarity when I have negative thoughts. If you are seeking work/life balance, start with the root cause: negative self-talk. When you control your thoughts, you control your day.”

Marcy Stoudt – CEO of Revel Coach, Founder of The Executive Mom Nest

 

 

3. Balance through Work Satisfaction

“Find a job that you love. Your career doesn't have to be (and shouldn't be) constraining. If you hate what you do for work, it will inevitably seep into your personal life. When you find time for travel, self-care, or family time, work might be that dark cloud that stays over you even when you are trying to enjoy yourself. Having a job that I am so passionate about has brought me work-life balance in unexpected ways. When I unplug, I feel deserving, and when I get back to work, I feel excited and invigorated.”

Lucy Carlisle Marketing

 

When life is humming along beautifully, we rarely think about balance.
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

 

4. Balance through Reflection

“When I think of balance, I envision two bowls dangling from a stick, delicately positioned to be even. Life doesn't work like that. Instead, I find harmony in my life through reflection, joy, and growth. If I dread an activity, I ask myself what purpose it serves. If it’s a class I know will help me professionally, I can look ahead to the end date and envision the success it will bring at a future date. If, however, it’s a toxic relationship with something such as junk food, I will replace the interactions with something that brings me joy, like giving myself a few extra minutes to read a novel.”

Alison Nissen, DTM Story Coach, Blogger, Speaker

 

 

5. Balance through Healthy Boundaries

“When I think of work/life balance, I think of seasons. I don’t believe there is a perfect balance to life because some seasons require more work, and some require more of life. What has helped me feel restored in each season is applying healthy boundaries. No matter the season, I keep within boundaries that align with my values, purpose, and goals. Should a season push up against those boundaries, I can adjust accordingly. When we know who we are and where we are going, then there is peace no matter the season.”

Petra Krebbs – Strengths Strategist™, Jon Gordon Certified Speaker & Trainer, Certified Gallup Strengths Coach

 

 

6. Balance through Energy Management

“A major way to restore my work/life balance is to manage my energy each workweek. When I break down my goals/tasks weekly, it is achievable. For example, I view the week as a pizza pie (yum) and try to eat one slice daily, so by the end of each day, I feel energized and have accomplished my daily tasks. Sure, there are weeks I’m planning special events or need extra time to cross the task of the list. By checking in on my energy rhythm, I usually feel less drained. Are you eating your slice daily or the entire pizza pie by Wednesday? Check yourself daily to understand your energy as it will balance your career and life goals.”

Becky Roth, MSW, LMSW – Certified Professional Coach, Career Coach, Speaker

 

 

7. Balance through Frequent Assessment

“When I'm feeling frustrated about my day, I can tell that it's time for me to restore balance. Restoring balance is a practice and needs to be assessed regularly. I have a three-step process for bringing back balance and suggest making time for this routine at least once a quarter.

1) Meditate – First, I need to calm myself down and take a moment to breathe and clear my head.

2) Process – Second, I need to make space for myself and process what makes me feel frustrated or overwhelmed. This is a great opportunity to go to my favorite cafe with a notebook and journal on the question.

3) Review - Finally, I review my calendar. I reevaluate everything on my schedule - declining meetings or removing responsibilities that no longer serve me. It's also helpful to look ahead and block some time in the future for myself, knowing how overwhelmed I'm feeling now.”

Lana Kitcher – Productivity & Efficiency Coach

 

When life is humming along beautifully, we rarely think about balance. However, when things start going sideways, we notice. Awareness is essential for change. There are many ways to restore work-life balance. My colleagues shared their favorite strategies with you.

Which ideas resonate most? What helps you create a healthy work-life balance? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Come join the conversation!

 
 
How to Practice Mindfulness for a Compassionate Fresh Start

Are you hard on yourself? Do you engage in negative self-talk about the things you didn’t do or should have done or won’t ever get to? If so, it’s a good time to engage in some self-compassion. You probably are more compassionate with your family, friends, colleagues, and even strangers. Do you extend that same graciousness to yourself?

This month I began taking a mindfulness training course. I’m enjoying the mindfulness meditation practice along with journaling and experimenting other ways of living more mindfully. So much of what I’m learning resonates with how I have always lived. Yet with this training, I’m learning new tools and ways to connect the learning to a fuller daily living experience.

Some of the mindfulness practice centers around focusing on your breath. By developing an awareness of the breath, the inhale and exhale or the expansion and the contraction of the body, you can quiet the mind, become more relaxed, less stressed, and gain better physical and mental clarity.

As I worked on the “Breath Awareness” practice this week, there was one particular passage of the guided meditation, led by Laurence Magro, psychotherapist and mindfulness educator, which I found particularly beautiful. It also connected to this month’s fresh start theme. She said that . . .

 

“The breath serving as an anchor, an anchor to the present moment. Knowing that you can always start over, coming back to the breath to refocus your attention on the present moment. Being willing to begin again with patience and kindness towards yourself.”

 - Laurence Magro, MBA, MS, LMHC

 

Are you in need of a compassionate fresh start? Could you use a boost, an anchor, some words of encouragement, or some self-compassion to engage in a do-over? Consider using your breath to refocus on this moment. Let go of the shoulds. Ground yourself in the here and now. Expand from there.

What are you experiencing right now? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Come join the conversation.

 

 

 

 

6 Tips for Next

When we prepare for the next step whether it’s small or big, it’s more likely that we’ll move forward successfully. Getting ready looks different for each of us. I was curious about my colleagues’ experiences, so I reached out to this wonderful group – Valentina Sgro, Cameron Gott, Anne Blumer, Seana Turner, Janet Barclay, and Sue West. I asked them, “How do you prepare for next?” Their responses are diverse and inspiring. My deepest gratitude goes to each of them for sharing their wisdom with us.

 

 

How do you prepare for next? . . .

 

Daydream

Daydreaming is my key element when 'preparing for next.' Some might use the word ‘visioning,’ but that doesn’t quite capture it for me. I don’t like surprises; I like a lot of lead time. That allows me to do a lot of daydreaming, playing out in my mind the different ways the ‘next’ thing can look or be. Sure those thoughts lead to some solid information-gathering to form a plan of action, but it’s the creation of alternate scenarios in my mind that guide me to the path I want to take. Maybe that’s why I’ve become a novelist.”

Valentina Sgro – Author of Patience Oaktree organizing novels and short stories 

  

Practice

“I’m relatively new to the game of ‘prepare for next’ since most of my years I was a card carrying member of the ‘back into next’ club. As a decent responder I’d react and respond my way into what was next - school, relationships, professions.  I’d let my positive and negative emotions dictate my next move. I would often over extend myself. Now I practice a more proactive stance and embrace preparation as an absolute for what is next.”

Cameron Gott, PCC – Mentor Coach, ADHD Coaching for Small Business Owners & Entrepreneurs

 

Celebrate

As I ponder on the question, ‘How do you prepare for next?’ my mind immediately jumps to, how will I prepare for the next chapter in my life? In one year my son and daughter will both graduate from college. We recently have lost one family pet and now our golden retriever has days, maybe weeks to live. I find the next chapter is preparing myself for a very, very empty nest. To prepare, I¹m going to celebrate with my children their achievements and their next chapter. And, I will make a book of memories of our family pets to commemorate them. In short to prepare for next, I celebrate and commemorate.”

Anne Blumer, CPO® – Professional Organizer, Author & Blogger

 

Imagine

The tricky thing about ‘next’ is that it’s shrouded in uncertainty. This can be intimidating, because it feels a bit out of control. For me, preparing for what’s next includes spending time considering various scenarios, and how I would like to respond. We never know what is behind the next door, but we can put some structure around how we will open the door, the way we will take our first steps, who we might walk with, and what will bring along. It’s also helpful to minimize daily, ambient chaos to free up the energy we need to tackle something new.”

Seana Turner – Professional Organizer, Blogger & Life Coach

 

Generate

I can become overwhelmed by new projects or big changes in my life or my business, but making a list of every task that has to be completed helps me to stay in control. Instead of waiting until I have a huge chunk of available time to focus on the project, I can delegate some tasks and chip away at others as my schedule allows and get to the next step without having to neglect other personal and professional commitments.”

Janet Barclay, MVA – Web Designer, Virtual Assistant & Blogger 

 

Visualize and Verbalize

“If I cannot visualize myself in a new situation or mindset, that’s my clue that I have more to prepare. It could be that I have not internalized the new situation and its impact or the presentation’s content, the project’s steps, or the client’s particulars. Project management and coaching also teach us that we cannot control every reaction, detail, or situation. Bigger risks I process aloud with a trusted individual. Lesser risks, I use self-talk, a voice recorder, or mind mapping. All are ways to get everything out of my head, see the full picture and create space to think, prepare and question.”

Susan Fay West, COC®, CPO-CD® – Certified Organizing Coach, ADHD Coach & Certified Professional Organizer in Chronic Disorganization

 

What great tips my colleagues shared about preparing for next. Several ideas center on having ponder-time. Other ideas include celebrating, making lists, and talking out loud. For me, next often begins with thinking, writing, or conversing. Which ideas resonate with you? How do you prepare for next? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Come join the conversation!

 

 

 

 

Possibility Thinking

It is our dream of what is possible that gives us hope.

When we envision positive outcomes, relationships and lives, we are using possibility thinking. When we let ourselves imagine what is possible, even if we’ve had a history of disappointments, we allow positive energy to enter our thoughts and actions. Dreaming is just as essential as taking action.

Dispense with limiting beliefs and negative self-talk. Instead let positive thoughts infuse your being. Instead of dwelling in what we didn’t do, focus on what we can do. Focus on what is possible. Focus on being creative, flexible, and open to other options. It’s freeing.

What’s possible?